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.NDARD AND MINOR DRAMA, 

No. 336. 



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Squire's * Daughter. 



(BEAM A.) 



WITH OAST OF CHARACTERS, ENTRANCES AND EXITS, 

RELATIVE POSITIONS OF THE PERFORMERS ON THE STAGE, 

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After Ten Years 

A Life's Revenge 

Arrahde Baugh < 

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226 Brae, the Poor House (xirl.... 4 

14 Brigands of Calabria 

321 Broken Link? 

272 Heyoud Pardon.......... ' \> 

•nn; or, Love's Victory 11 

2»iS Clearing the Mists........ & 

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...in 

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91 Michael Erie 

[Uler of Derwent ^ ater. 

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Outcast's \Vif< 
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Ticket of Leave Man... 

Tom Blossom 

T oodles 

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Will-o'-the-Wisp,, 

Won at Last 

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Turn of the Tide 
Three i classes a 1 > 
Ten Nights in n Ba 

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\ Day In A Doctoi 
A Plc'i.-ure Trip 
\ Li^a.l Holiday 
An Afflicted Farailj 
Panght in tin- Vcl 
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Squire's Daughter 

A COMEDY DRAMA, 

IN THREE ACTS, 



— BY — 



Will L. Walker. 



5 



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TO WHICH IS ADDED 

/- DESCRIPTION OF THE COSTUMES-CAST OF THE CHARACTERS- 
ENTRANCES AND EXITS-RELATIVE POSITIONS OF THE 
PERFORMERS ON THE STAGE, AND THE WHOLE 
OF THE STAGE BUSINESS. 



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"To'v 



THE SQUIRES DAUGHTER. AJ\ 



CAST OF CHARACTERS. 

>QliRK Hawkins Memher of Congress . 

Josiah Brow.v From the country. 

Albert Rkade Not beyond redemption. 

Fred Dudley x-A knoyer. 

Francois A descendant from Napoleon. 

Mrs. Hawkins The head of the family* 

STKLLA Brown Able to take care of herself. 

Lili.a Hawkins The Squire's Daughter. 

TIME.-The Present. 

TIME OF PL A Y1NG-2 HO URS. 

COSTUMES.-Modern. 



SYNOPSIS OF EVENTS. 

ACT I.— Home of Squire Hawkins— Lilla asleep— Arrival of Mr. Dudley— The 
rude awakening and apology— Mr. Dudlev meets the Squire— Arrival of Stella Brown 
—Mr. Reade and Stella— Squire Hawkins delivers his speech before Francois— "I 
wish he would trv someone else first"— The insult to Mr. Dudley— "He is in my way" 
—"I must win Lilla's fortune" — Arrival of Mr. Brown — Francois mistakes him for 
a tramp— "He's too sassy"— Reade tells Lilla that Dudley has a wife— How Sam 
Smith shot the mule — Stella discovers Reade's design on Stella — "You are a cowardly 
noltroon"— Timely arrival of Dudley and Lilla— A shot from Lilla's pistol saves 
Dudley's life— "Curse you, you have shot me." 

ACT II. — Stella and Lilla— He must prove his innocence — Arrival of Dudley — A 
cool reception— "Did you kiss her when you left, and have they got the measles?"— 
A misunrle! standing— Mr. Brown and the Squire attend a temperance meeting — 
Reade's escape from the asylum, where he was taken a maniac, after the attempte I 
murder — I ilia in danger— Arrival of Dudlev, who mesmerizes Reade find sa.es the 
life of Lilla — The p oposal — "I have no wife" — Accepted — Return of Mr. B own and 
tie Squire slightly intoxicated— A game of base ba 1 with a package of dynamite — 
The Squire expla ns to Mrs. Hawkins the effect of too much cjld water aft jr his 
sp°ech. 

ACT III.— Home of Mr. Brown— Stella and her father— Squire Hawkins and 
family, with Mr. Dudley, visit Mr, Brown— "(toI darn it, I'm awful! glad to see ye 
all" — The Squire exposes his ignorance of farm life — Dudley kisses Stella by mistake 
—Lilla an observer— "A mistake. I a-sure you"— "Don't you ever kiss another girl 
except me" — The So. ire airs his views <n agricul ure, to the amusement and dis- 
gust of Mr. Brown an I Mrs. Hawkins — "J lines, you are a fool"— Squire can't get 
the best of her, but he can't rest until th^ quarrel is mado up— The'reconciliation, in 
which the Squire won't speak first— Reide recovers his reason— "Lilla lost tome"— 
A happy ending— The betrothal of Stella and Charley, Dudley and the Squire's 
Daughter. 



PROPERTIES. 

ACT I.— Let'ers for Francois; portrait on wing, r.; bell outside; notes for Squires 
areech; book of engravings on table, L.; fan for Lilla; loaded revolver for Brown; 
rao'verand cud for Reade. 

A.CT IT.— Checkerboard on table, R.; newspaper on tab' e, L.; book for Lilla pack- 
a.'>' nf I'vi.lusive lor R -ado. 

ACT 1 1 1.— Bread, butler, apple sauce, su-rar, milk, dishes t> set table for six; tea 
pot for Stella; plants on table, L. : high backed old fashioned rocker. 



STAGE DIRECTIONS. 
R..m»an« Right; t... Left; R. n.. Right Hand; t,. h.. Left Hani; r\. Center; 3. k. 
f2d v.,\ Second Entrance; v. e.. Upper Entrance; u. n.. Middle Door; v., the Flat 
p. v., boor ic Plat; k. 0., Right of Centir; L. c, Left of Center. 

B. R. c. c. l. o. r„ 

„v Th* reade r is su pposed to be upon the stage facia* the audienoa. 



TMP92-007567 



The Squire's Daughter. 

ACT I. 

SCENE. — Handsome parlor in Squire Hawkins house — table l., just 
back of first icing — big easy chair r. of table, having high back 
and no arms — books on table — small stand r., against fiat — sofa R. 
C, chair l. back — draperies c. d. — placque, banners, etc — portrait 
r., on wing — Lilla discovered in easy chaia, l., asleep and out oj 
sight of c. i). 

Enter, Francois, c. d., with letters — puts them on table, r. 

Francois. Nobody here, eh ! Faith ! it's meself will be axin' the 
Co. eminent for a pension fur me services in carryin' letters from 
the front door to the table here. Since the Squire has bin elected 
to Congress he's had more kowmunications then even me cousin 
Terry, him that's an alderman in the Fourth Ward; but I suppose — 
(bell outside) Ah ! be dad, there goes the bell. (exit, c. d. 

Lilla. (waging up, but still sleepy) Oh, hum ! S^me one has 
been lure. Francois I suppose. O! dear, my last night's dissipa- 
tion has robbed me of my rest. I wonder where father is; I must 
te 1 him how Alhert Kende anjioys me with his attentions. It's a 
disagreeable subject and 1 would rather finish my nap, and I guess J 
will while — 1 — am — waiting— (yawns) — foi — father — (sleeps 

Enter, Francois and Fred Dudley, c. d. 

Fan. Steph roightin sir! Shnre there's no one here at all— at 
all. Sit down, sir! the Squire will soon be here. (exit, c. d. 

Dudley. Thank you, I will wait. 1 know the Squire will be glad 
to >ee me, as he needs my assistance about his business. By the way, 
1 am just a trifle curious to see the Squire's daughter. Ah! but 
that is indeed a fine portrait, (gazes on portrait on wing, R.) She is 
beautiful; it would not be very hard to fall in love with her, but 
pshaw ! she is far above a poor lawyer like me. Let me step back a 
bit and get a better view; distance lends enchantment they say, but 
in this case it would be more enchanting if she were not so far re- 
moved from me. I suppose this is as near as 1 shall ever come to 
the fair original. 



? THE SQUIRE'S DAUGHTER. 

During speech, Dudley has stepped backwards to Lill's chair, and at 
end of speech, places hand on back of chair and sits in Lill's lap, 
eyes on picture. 

Dudley, {jumping up) Thunder! 
I Alia, (jumping up) Oh ! 

Dudley. I — I— er— I most humbly be<: your pardon, Miss — 
Lilla. {sternly) Well, sir! I think you have occasion too; please 
explain your-elt. 

Dudley. The facts of the ease are these : The servant showed me 
inhere, assuring me the room was unoccupied. The first object 
which caught my eve, was your portrait, and while gazing at it, E 
siepped back from it 10 i et abetter view, and mechanically sat down 
in the first chair I touched with nit looking. These are the facts. 
Lilla. And your business here? 

Dudley. I am a lawyer and have been sent here by mv firm to 
R'ljust certain business matters tor the Squire, who I am proud to 
say, is a personal friend of mine. Fred. Dudley at your service. 

(6oios 
Lilla. {starts) Mr. Dudlev, At'y., indeed, father has mentioned 
your name and always in terms of highest praise. Indeed, I have 
learned to respect you for the strength an 1 integrity of character, 
which father has so often told me of. 

Dudley. Mercy ! I pray you, I only ask to be forgiven. 
Lilla. Well, I don't know ; are you sure it was my picture you 
i\ere looking at? 
Dudley. Quite sure. 

Lilla. Then, sir! you are forgiven. Ha! ha! ha! I suppose I 
/ell asleep and am in part to blame; but excuse me please, papa will 
soon be here, (goes to C. D. and turns — Dudlky down R. — aside) 
I don't think I will say anything to lather about Albert Reade. be- 
cause — {exit, c. d. 

Dudley. Distance was annihi'ated that time. So the Squire has 
been praising me; well I can't say I like it, although it does sound 
pl<a*ant when repeated by a b autiful young lady. I shall have to 
get away from here very soon, if 1 wish to remain heart-whoie. 

Squire H. {outside) Francois! Francois! Where in thunder can 
he be ! 

Enter, Squire Hawkins, c. d. 

Ah! 

Dudley. Good morning Squire Hawkins. 

Sq. H. Why Mr. Dudley, how do you do? I am delighted to gee 
you. {they shake hands 

Dudby. Thank you, Squire. I have b en sent down loassist you 
in 'he business Affairs you consulted us about. 

Sq. If. Exactly. Are you stopping at the hotel? 

[lakes letters from table, r. 

D'<dlr>!. Yes, sir! 

Sq. li. Then 1 be-_ r you will at once take up your quarters here. 
1 will pend tor your luggage. It will, I hope, be more pleasant for 
you, and m<>re convenient tor us both. 

Dudley. B it I :un a'rai 1 — 

><y. II. Not a word sir! not a word, I always have my own way 
hciu. 



THE SQUIEE'S DA UGH TEE. 5 

Dudley. Well then, since yon think best, I will do so with ma iy 
:hank< for your kind hospitality. 
Sq. H. Exactly ! Say no more, for it will — 

Enter. Lilla, c. d. 

Ah ! good-morning my dear. 

Lilla. Good-morning, papa. (sees Dudley and is com/used 

Sq. H. Lilla, my dear, allow me to introduce my young friend, 
Mr. Dudlev, of whom you have often heard me speak. Mr. Dudley, 
m}' daughter Lilla. 

Lilla. We have met before, papa. 

Sq. H. Eh! 

Dudley. Yes, quite accidentlv (aside) and forcibly. 

Sq. H. O! very well. Mr. Dudley will st iy with us some time, 
Lilla, as I have much business to transact with him, you will excuse 
loth now, as we have to go to my private study. 

Lilla. Cert duly papa, (exit, Squtre H. "and Dudley, c. d.) 
W»dl, he is very handsome and clever too. (sighs) I feel quiie 
interested in him, and then our very romantic meeting! Ha! ha! 
I a! 1 wonder — O! pshaw, how silly 1 am — let me see, Stella will be 
lieie to-day ; it is time now. Dear girl, hnv I long to see her and 
sh* has promised to make me a long visit, (bell rings) That unit 
i r Stella. 

Fran, (outside) This way, mum. 

Enter, Francois and Stella, c. d. 

Lilla. O! I am so glad to see you. (they embracO Are you 
ii- d out by your journey ? 

Stella. Not a bit, dear. Just let me re nove my things and I shall 
\ e quite comfortable and at home. 

(removes them, Francois takes them off r. u. e. 

Lilla. Of course dear. Now, how ar- all the folks at home, and 
wliv did not your father come wi h you? We should have been so 
•dad to see him, (both sit r. and l. 

Stella. I couldn't persuade him to c me with me. He is so much 
of a farmer and a homebod}*-, he hates to go away from home; but 
lie has promised to come later on and carry me back. 

Lilla. Well, I'm glad we are t" s,r niin. He wa« so . iud to me 
when 1 was visiting you, that I Iovj him dearly. 

Enter, Keade, c. d. 

Eeade. And whom, might I enquire, is the fortunate individual 
who possesses your love? (Stella has back to him, she starts 

Lilla. (col fly) No one you would be interested in, I think. , 

Iieale. Beg pardon, no offense. Perhaps your friend will en- 
lighten me, will you not, Miss— er— (all rise awl face 

Lilla. Miss Stella Brown, Mr. Keade. 

(Reade and Stella both start — are confused 

Ii'.ade. I am delighted to meet you, Miss Brown. You are a 
stranger in this section? 

Stella. Yes. I am visiting my ok! friend, Lilla. 

Reade. That is most fortunate. L own the adjoining estate, and 
take the liberty of an old friend and neighbor to call in" quite often. 



5 THE SQUIRE'S DAUGHTER. 

[ trust we shall have pleasant times. Eh ! Miss Lilla? 
Lilla. (coldly) O ! certainly, I hope so. 

Enter, Francois, c. d. 

Fran. Av yer plaze, Miss Lilla, yer mother would be after seem' 
yer in her room. (exit, c. d. 

Lilla. Very well. Excuse me please. Mr. Reade, I will leave 
you to the tender mercies of Stella. (exit, c. d. 

Reade. Stella, I did not expect to see you here. 

Stella. Nor did I think to find you here. 

Reade. It is surely fate. And now Stella, I am happy indeed to 
renew our pleasant acquaintance of last summer. Perhaps I may 
now find favor in your eyes. 

Stella, (looking down) Perhaps. 

Reade. I am content for the present then : shall we walk in the 
garden, Stella? 

Stella. With pleasure. (exit, both, c. d. 

Enter, Francois, l., 1 e. 

Fran. O ! ho ! a foin pair of turtle doves. 

(goes to c. and looks cut 

Enter, Squire Hawkins, l., 1 e. 

Sq. H. Ahem! (Francois jumps and comes down R.) Francois, 
attention! I have here a speech, which I shall deliver at the next 
session. Now I wish to rehearse it here, and you must give me 
your undivided attention, as I shall consider you the audience, pro 
tern. 

Fran, (aside) Faith, I wish he would try it on the dog first. 
(aloud) Yissir! (stands erect 

Sq. H. Exactly. Ahem ! ''The subject which tc-day, I submit to 
this August body — 

Fran. Shure it's July? 

Sq. H. Js one which should interest every true son of America. 
Ahem! (looks at Francois) and Ireland — " 

Fran. Erin go braush ! 

Sq. H. Shut up ! What do you mean, sir ! by your silly ejacu- 
/ations. 

Fran. Shuresor! I've no silly relations, except one, and he's in 
Congress, (aside) Blacking boots. 

Sq. H. Silence sir! 

Fran. I'm dumb. 

Sq.H. To continue: "We all respect and love the ladies — par- 
ticularly the pretty ones — and would do all in our power for them. 
But do we like to see woman's ambition made manifest by finding 
her at the ballot box, by aspiring to administrative power ? No I 

(Francois jumps 

Enter, Mrs. Hawkins, c. d., unseen by the Squire — Francois sees 
her and makes violent efforts to attract the Squire's notice 

We would protect them ; they are the weaker sex, and it becomes 
Dur noble duty to defend them with our strong manly arms." 



THE SQUIBE'S DAUGHTER. 7 

Fran, (schuffle) Ahem! ahem! 

Sq. H. (to Francois) Stop your blamed noise! "It is a duty 
which we accept! I say accept!" 

Fran. Yer said that before. 

Sq. H. (to Francois) Will you be quiet, sir? "Therefore I am 
an enemy of Woman's Rights, so-called, as opposed to the power of 
man, because she is not a recognized power and cannot coerce the 
man she would govern !" 

Mrs. H. (advances, takei Squire by the ear — Francois delighted) 
Come Janie?. 

Sq. H. (meekly) Certainly, my dear ! (exit, both, c. d. 

Fran. That's what the Squire calls the opposing argument! O ! 
no ! Tra, la, la, la ! (dances off c. and runs into Dudley, who enters 

Enter, Dudley, c. d. 

Dudley. What the deuce — 

Fran. Beg pardon, sor! didn't mean to interrupt the law. 

(exit, c. d. 
Dudley. The impudent scamp! (goes r. 

Enter, Lilla, l., 1 e. — Readg and Stella, c. d, 

Lilla. Ah! Stella, have you and Mr. Reade had a pleasant walk? 

Stella. Very pleasant. 

Beade. Delightful! 

Lilla. Stella, let me present Mr. Dudley. Mr. Dudley, Mb a 
Brown; Mr. Reade, my friend, Mr. Dudley. Mr. Dudley is staying 
with us a while, on business with papa. (Dudley and Stella ac- 
knowledge — Dudley presents his hand to Reade, who purposely re- 
fuses it — Dudley starts back and clinches list at the insult) Mr. 
'Dudlev, I want your opinion on some engravings, please. 

Dudley. Certainly, with pleasure, Miss Lilla. 

(both sit back at table 

Beade. (Reade and Stella sit front) You are not tired, I hope. 

Stella. Ono! indeed, I enjoyed my walk so very much that, I 
mean — (confused 

Beade. But not more than I. Stella, forgive me, but may I not 
now hope that you will return ray love. Last summer you would 
not give me an answer, but now h ive you nothing t > say to me? 

Stella. What would you have me say ? 

Beade. That you love me ! 

Stella. I cannot say that now. Go anil give me time to think. 
A woman does not always know her own heart. 

Beade. Very well. 1 am content, and will go, trusting that for- 
tune will be kind to me. Good-bye. 

Stella. Gcod-bye. (Dudley goes over to table 

Beade. Good morning Miss Stella, good morning Mr. er — er — 
Dudley, yes. 

{exit, c. d. — Dudley springs to his feet, but says nothing 
Lilla. Stella dear, won't you join us? 

Stella. ]STo, thank you. I feel tiled and fear a headache, so I will 
go to my room a little while. 
Lilla. That is too bad ; but I hope you will soon feel better. 

(exit, Stella, c, d. 



8 THE SQUIBE'S DAUGHTEB. 

Dudley, (sits) The engravings are very fine, Miss Lilla. 

Lilla. Yes, very. Do you know Mr. Dudley, confidentally, I 
fear Stella is falling in love with that Mr. Reade. They seem very 
well acquainted for so short a time. 

Dudley. With that Mr. Reade ! Well, what a pity that girls will 
fall in love, isn't it? 

Lilla. (demurely) I suppose men never do — do they? 

Dudley, (quickly) Yes they do, and being a man I, I er — 

Lilla. Well, what? 

Dudley. 1 feel sorry for them. 

Lilla. O ! sorry for who ! The men ? 

Dudley. Yes. For many a man can never possess the fair woman 
he loves, by reason of difference in wealth, social position, etc., and 
often in despair, mates with one he does not love and ends in misery. 

Lilla. But lack of success is often due to faint heart, which you 
know "ne'er won fair lady." 

Dudley. True, 'tis as you say. But what of that Mr. Reade, which 
causes you to fear Stella ha^ fallen in love with him. 

Lilla. Well yon see; although I dislike to speak ill of a neighbor, 
I must say I distrust him. He is, J believe rich, but dissipated. I 
have an instinctive dislike to him. Do not, I beg of you, th nk ill 
of me for speaking so confidentally to you, a comparative stranger. 

Dudley. No indeed, Miss Lilla, far be it from my mind to harbor 
such a thought. I am a sort of helper and councilor to your father 
fit present, and you can regard me as the traditional family adviser 
ibout sixtv years old. Ha ! ha ! 

Lilla. Regard you as sixty years old ! Well, I'll try, ha! ha! ha! 
But Mr. Dudley, you must have noticed, that for some reason or 
other, Mr. Reade did not treat you as one gentleman should another. 

Dudley. Yes I did, but for the presence of ladies, he would have 
had occasion to repent of his insolence. 

Lilla. Can } r ou assign any reason for his enmity ? 

Dudley. None whatever. Can you? 

Lilla. I? Well yes, perhaps I can. 

Dudley. Will you kindly do so? 

Lilla. O! do not ask me, Mr. Dudley, I cannot really. 

Dudley. Eh! Cannot? Well, I shall know some day I suppose, 
when our villain stabs me In the back, whispers in my ear his object 
and gloatingly watches me die; then — 

Lilla. O! please don't conjure up such horrid picture*, I can't 
bear them, (drops fan, both s oop to pick it up — hump heads, both take 
it and drop it, then Dudley picks it up and hands it to her. Thantv 
you. 

Enter, Francois, c. d*, followed by Squire. 

Sq» H. Francois, you concentrated essence of stupidity, why did 
you show those thrc'e tramps into my study, saying they were some 
of, of my political constituents? 

Fran. Indade thin, how was I to know? They were old enough 
to vote any way. (exit, r. u. e. 

fq. II. Bah! nothing but beggars, who will spend the money I 
give them for whiskey, no doubt. 

Lilla. (takes his arm) O! papa, you dear old bear; you are kind 
to everyone, and can never refuse aid. 



THE SQUIRE'S DAUGHTER. 9 

Sq. H. No! I ain't kind either, don't I know? I'm cross and 

ugiy— 

Enter, Mrs. Hawkins and Stella, c. d. 

But exceedingly quiet at home! Mrs. Hawkins sic down, nnd Stella, 
my dear, make yourself comfortable. You see, Lilla, your mother 
and I met Stella in the garden, which was a surprise to us, as we did 
not know she had come. (all sit but Squire 

Mrs. H. James, did you do my little errnn 1 yesterdav. 

Sq. H. (aside) Now what the deuce have 1 forgotten? She says 
1 always forget. O! yes! I know; that drapery. Well, I brought 
that home al' right, thank the Lord. 

Mrs. H. James, do you hear? 

Sq. H. En! my dear, I did not quite understand. 

Enter, Francois, c. d. i 

Fran. Av yer plnz », a gentleman to see the Squire. Will detain 
per only assort time. (exit, c. d. 

Sq. II. Ah ! yes, excuse me a moment, please. (exit, c. d. 

Mr*. H. Lilla, 1 asked your father yesterday, to call at the E . - 
p'o-m-nt Agency and engage a girl for the kitchen, as we really need 
• inotiier. I presume he has orgotten as usual. 

Lilla. Papa is always so busy, that he is certainly excusable, if 
ue has. 

'Mr*. H. But I told him very particularly, and I think that was 
[lie only errand. 

Enter, Squire, c. d. 

Sq. H. The gentleman called in refterence to a big political meet- 
in soon to be held, at which 1 am to speak on temperance. 

Mrs. H. Well J imcs? 

Sq. II. Well, my deir? 

Mrs. II. My errand? 

tq.II. (aside) ! the drapery, (aloud) Yes my dear, your errand 
I performed to the best ot my masculine ability. They said, that 
they guessed they could suit me. 1 t<dd them I wanted something 
very nice looking, which would he an onvnnent to the house, as I 
was more particular about that than my wife, aud — 

Mrs. II. James! 

Sq. II. {cheerfully) They gave me something very stylish and I 
was quire delighted, so taking it on my arm, I came home. 

Mrs. H. (qasping) Oh! where did vou leave — 

Sq. H. Leave? O! on the hall table, 1 think. 

Mrs. II. James, are you crazv ? 

Sq. II. Eh ! Am I crazy ? Well Madam, I can proudly say I am 
not. 

Mrs. H. The idea of a man engaging a youni, nice looking, 
stylish, ornamental girl for the kitchen, is bad enough; butto parade 
around the city with her on your arm, considering you've a wife at 
home, and then declaring you left her on the hall table, is enough 
to prove any man crazy. 

Sq. II. Eh! my dear! my dear ! girl what! yes what in thunder 
do vou mean? 



10 THE SQUIRE'S DAUGHTEB. 

Mrs. II. Why I mean the girl you were just telling us you had 
engaged. 

Sq. H. O! Patience on a monument grinning at — at th* deuce! 
I whs speaking of the drapery yon wanted, which I brought home! 

Mrs. II. O! 1 forgot that. Well, what about the servant 1 asked 
you to hire? 

Sq. H. (mocking) O ! I forgot that, my dear, it entirely slipped 
my mind. Well, better luck next time. Come, Mr. Dudley, I have 
discovered a new complication in that business of ours, and besides, 
1 see my wife is jealous of our new servant girl. Ha! ha! ha! 

(exit, c. d. 

Dudley. Excuse me ladies. {exit, c. 

Mrs. II. A very nice young man, that Mr. Dudley. The Squire 
says, he has no property, but is dependent on his salary, which is a 
good one, however. 

Stella. What if he is poor, "a man's a man for aw that." 

Mrs. H. Take care, Stella, vou don't fali in love and elope with 
him. 

Lilla. No danger, mother, Stella's eyes look else where. 

Mrs. H. We 1 girls, I'll leave you and go and seek my drapery, or 
stylish servant, which ever it may be. (exit, l. e. 

Lilla. Ha! hai p ipa is such a dear old blunderer. Stella dear, 
don't you think Mr. Dudley is just the least bit handsome? 

Stella. So that is your opinion. Well, no doubt he thinks the 
same and a good deaf more of you. 

Lilla. Perhaps he does, but how am I to know, men are so stupid 
and a girl can't fling herself at a man's head. 

(Reade appears at c. and listens 

Stella. Tell me dear, do you think you would ever care for him? 

Lilla. Yes, I do think so, for I consider him a true, honest man ; 
but time will tell. I know that he has some mistaken ideas con- 
cerning differences of position, etc. Should he ever care for me, 
which would bestrange, and should E ever care for him, which would 
not be strange, I would show him the truth as a true woman can do. 
But I am talking silly; come, let us take a walk. 

Stella. With pie tse, dear. (exeunt, l. e. 

Enter, Reade, c. d. 

Reade. So! 'tis as I thought. She is already beginning to care 
for this young lawyer. Curse the luck ! How will my love making 
to Lilla prosper? Love! yes love of her money. And so by the 
way, I must make love to Stella, the simple country girl, so that I 
may have an excuse to call here and see Lilla. But I must sweep 
ihnt Dudlev from my path, by some means or other, {looks l.) 
Ah ! Lilla comes this way alone. 1 am sure that Stella has told her 
nothing. Poor lool ! Well, here goes for one more chance. 

(goes r. 

Enter, Lilla, l. e. 

Lilla. Where could I have left my hat? Ah! here it is. Why, 
Mr. Reade, I thought you had gone some time ago. 
Reade. No doubt you hoped so; but Lilla, you misjudge me. 
Lilla. (coldly) Indeed. 



V 



THE SQUIRE'S DA UGH TEE. U 

Eeade. Lilla you know I love and wish you to be mine. And 
now I see you have a fancy for a beggarly lawyer. 

Lilla. Sir! Mr. Dudley is a gentleman, and that is more than you 
have vet proven yourself to be. 

Eeade. So ! A gentleman is he, to come here and make love with 
his eves, if not with his tongue, and yet have a wife at home. 
Lilla. A wife! 

Eeade. Av ! and he neglects her, and that is why I did not tr*at 
him as a genleman. I do not know him personally, but know what 
I have told you to be a fact, and yet you giva me credit for no gen- 
tlemanly feelings. 

Lilla. If I have misjudged you, forgive me. (aside) The wretch ! 
E"ade. And Lilla. will you not give me one word of hope? 
Lilla. I have nothing to say to anyone. I want to be alone. 
Eeade. So be it. But do not leave me out of your thoughts. 

(exit, Lilla, C. d. 
Eeade. Well, for a first-class liar, I think I take the prize. Thanks 
to mv genius. There will be a misunderstanding between Dudley 
and Lilla, and I will prosper in my suit. As for Stella, I don't care 
how she takes it. I can break with her and she will be too proud to 
confide her sorrows to Lilla. Ha! ha! ha! Love! Bah! Money 
is worth all the love in the world, and I am playing a risky game for 
that same filthy lucre. (exit, c. d. 

Enter, Josiah Br iwjt, l. e. 

Brown. Well, may I be kicked bv a spavined calf, but Uhis is the 
florgondest house I ever was in. Rapped at the back door; nobody 
there, walked in and found my way in here. I calkerlate this mu?t 
be the best room. 

Enter, Francois, r. e. 

Hello there! whit in creation is that. Sho! giteout! 

Fran. Sor! Phat do yer want? 

Brown. Stella here? 

Fran. O! and it's Miss Stella ye want to see? Well thin, she 
don't rescave tramps! 

1 Brown, (in a rage) Tramps! you wall eved heifer you, what do 
you mean? I ain't no tramp. My name's Brown. Josiah Brown, 
and I am Stella Brown's father. She here? 

Fran, (aside) O! holy snakes! (aloud) Beg pardon, sor. I 
will call her at once, take a seat. There, I want after calling yez a 
tramp, sor; 1 was only telling yez that she don't rescave tramps, she 
don't. 

Brown. Wall, I didn't suppose she did. (exit, Francois, c. d. ) 
Tramp-! If I had that feller to hum, I'd sot him direshin' wheat, 
and I guess he would hit the back of his head with the flail about 
seven times out of six. He's too tarnation sassy, but foreigners 
allers are. 

Enter, Stella, c. d. 

Stella. ! father dear, I am so glad to see you ! (embrace 

Brown. Thar' darter, anyone would think you had'nt seen me 

fn~ ' "ear 



IZ THE SQUIB E'S D AUGHT EB. 

Stella. You must have taken the very next train; I did not ex- 
pect you for a week yet. 

Brown, Are you sure darter, I'll be welcome? If I ath't, I'll 
start my boots tarnation quick. 

Stella. Never fear. Tnev are all anxious to see you. 

Brown. Wall Stella, th?y will miss yeou to hum, leastwise one 
3*011 nor feller I krow, Charlie Harris. 

Stella. O, pshaw! he cnres nothing; for me I am sure. 

Brown. Git eout — don't tell me— guess I know. 

Stella. Well, he never said so. 

Brown. But you never giv' him a chance, you teased him so; but 
then dearie, it will all come right, I know. 

Enter, Mrs. Hawkins and Lilla, c. d. 

Lilla. O! Mr. Brown, you dear o'd soul! I'm so glad you have 
come. (they shake hands 

Jlrs. II. Mr. Brown, we are delighted to see you. 

{they shake hands 

Brown. Well, that's w at I call a hearty welcome. (all sit 

Lilla. How is every hotly and everything on the dear old farm, 
.and in the sleepy little town? 

Brown. O! everything on the farm is about the same. I got a 
new brindle calf though, and a pair of the all firedest puniest oxen 
you ever seed. Was thinking of buyin' a mowin' machine, but you 
see, Jackson on the next farm got one, and in two months, thirteen 
men lost an arm, leg. finger or somethin', applied to the government 
for a pension, and got it for bein' a disabled soldier of the lare war. 
I hed too much respect for my country, to hev sech a machine as 
that around. 

Lilla. How dreadful ! I think you must have dreamed that, Mr. 
Brown. 

Brown. Haw! haw! haw! Well, maybe I did, but there is 
s< methin' I didn't dream though. 

Lilla. What is it? 

Brown. About that young Sam Smith, as was dead gone on you. 
O! I ?ee you remember. Wall, alter you left, he looked glum a< i\n 
owl. Just before I left hum, he borrowed a pistol of me. I noticed 
he looked more down in the mouth than usual. Here is the pistol, 
all loaded, but one chamber and that is gone. 

Omnes. O ! gracious ! did he — 

Brown. Did he whit? 

Lilla. Shoot himself. 

Brown. No, not much he didn't. He shot an old mule and 'twas 
the wust shot I ever seed. 

Omnes. {in disgust) My! 

Brown. Yas, he fire 1 a r . a squirrel about a yard away, but the 
shot went too high and killed tiie mule over the wall. Cost Sam $20. 
I brought the revolver along, so none of the folks at hum would go 
foolin' with it and set shot, 'cause they didn't know 'twas lo.ided. 

Lilla. And what has become of Sam? 

Brown. O ! he's goin' to marry that cross eyed gal of Seth Drums, 
the one that preaches "Woman's Rights." 

Lilla. Well I declare, I wish him joy; but you must see papa. 
I'll call him. (exit, c. d. 



TEE SQUIRE'S DAUGHTER. 13 

Mrs. H. The Squire is very bug)', having just been elected to 
Congress you know. 

Brown. Yes, I know he must have an all fired lot to do. I know 
?omcthin' about it, for I was selectman of our town for six years, 
Rnd had a little to do. {goes to table, l., lays revolver on it cocked 

Stella. Five years father; but that is decidedly different from 
being in Congress; I think. 

Enter, Squire Hawkins and Lilla, c. d. 

Brown. How'de ye do, Squire. {shakes 

Sq. H. My dear, sir! [ am indeed delighted to see you here, and 
I hope you will enjoy yourself as much as I did when visiting at 
your pleasant home. 

Brown. Wall, that's hearty ! Se ms to me Squire, you ain't 
lcokin' so well as when I seed yeou last. 

Sq. H. The fares of the nation, sir! Political duties; they pu'l 
one down, I tell you. Ahem ! 

Enter, Francois, c. d. 

Fran. Dinner is waiting. 

Mrs. H. Then let us all go. {exeunt, c. d., but Francois 

Fran. Bezorra, the idea of me calling Mr. Brown a tramp. 
F iith, he's a noice gintlemau, and so is Miss Stella and Miss Lilla, 
bless her purty eyes. O, ho! Oirelands the place for the purtv eyes 
rind colleens. Them's the kind for me. it's a bit av a song I'll sing 
*o amuse myself. (Irish song introduced— exit, r. e. 

Enter, Stella, c. d. 

Stella. I cared not to eat, as I to'd them I had the headache. 
{sits in big arm chair, l., out of sight) This Albert Reade somehow 
fascinates me now, even as he did when I met him at home. H« 
wished me to say nothing to Lilla of our previous acquaintance. 
Why t I wonder. Somehow [ don't fully trust him, he d >e-n't seem 
honest and sincere like Charley at home. Poor Ch*' or, he Iovhs 
me. Perhaps, but never mind, Albert Reade wi lies uu to know 
him better, and so I will before I decide. 

Enter, Reade, c. d. 

Reads. Ah! the room is vacant; so much the better, as I need a 
little time for reflection before I see Stella. How shall 1 break with 
her. I care less than nothing for her, and I am now pretty sure of 
winning Lilla and her monev, which by the way, is of the most 
value. If Stella loves me, she will make a confounded scene and 
bother. If she don't, then all will be easy, as I have made a fool of 
her all along. As for the very honorable Mr. Dudley, his goose is 
cooked; the lew necessary lies I told Lilla, have fixed him. But 
enough. I will c 11 Francois, {goes to c. owl calls) Francois! 
Francois! (Stella exit, after a glance at him, * ,1k. 

Enter, Francois, c. d. 

Fran. Sor! 

Reade. Please take my card to Mis? Stella, {exit, Francois, c, 
».) Now for the struggle, which I don't by any me ins fancy, but 
needs must, 



14 THE SQ VIBE'S DAUGBTEB. 

Enter, Stella, c. d. 

Stella. Ah ! Mr. Reade so soon aqa r n ? 

Beade. Eh! yes, I find I have a rather unpleasant duty to per- 
form and am therefore here. {both sit 

Stella. Surely there is nothing unp'easant here, I hope. 

Beade. We are all liable to mistakes, think you not, Stella? 

Stella. Yes. most assurely so; in fact, do you know I came very 
near making the biggest mistake in my life to-day. 

Beade. Indeed, is'it possible? 

Stella. Yes, and the strangest part of it is, that it closely con- 
cerns you. 

Beade. (aside) Ah I she is going to free me herself — good. 
(aloud) And what is the mistake? 

Stella, (rising) In considering you a gentleman, instead of the 
coward and poltroon that you nre! 

Beade. (rising) Furies! Woman, what do you mean? 

Stella. This, that I understand your whole game to marry Lilla 
for her money ; that you amused yourself with me for your own in- 
terests. Now 1 say, that I care nothing for you and never did; you 
fascinated me for a time, but now I see you as you are, a miserable 
.cowardly scoundrel. 

Enter, Dudley, c. d. and Lilla, l., 1 e. — music quick, but low till 
curtain down. 

Beade. The fiend seize you ! Take that for your sharp tongue ! 

(raises hand to strike Stella 
Dudley, (rushes forward) You refused my hand once, accept it 
n ow! 

Strikes Reade — Reade reels to r. comer— Stella goes l. — Dudley 
turns back on Reade and comes toward Lilla at table — Reade 
draws revolver, raises it to fire at Dudley's back — Lillas's hand 
falls on revolver on the table, she grasps it, raises it and fires at 
Reade, who falls — he raises on elbow, stares at Lilla. 

Beade. Curse you ! 

Then drops back— Dudley catches Lilla in his arm, half fainting— 
everybody on at pistol shot, 

TABLE A U. 

CUBTAIN. 

END OP ACT I. 



ACT II. 



SCENE I. — Same as Act /., checkerboard on table r., newspaper on 

table, l. 

Mrs. IT. (knitting) I declare, Mr. Brown, I should b3 lonesome 
enough if it wasn't for you. The Squire has gone down town to ad- 
dress a big temperance meeting, and Stella and Lilla are plotting 
mischief, I presume. 



THE SQUIBE'S DAUGHTER. 15 

Brown. (R., with book) Wall, thev dew say poor company is bet- 
ter than none, so I suppose I kinder fill in the gap. 

Mrs. H. O! don't depreciate yourself in that way. I am sure 
we shall nil miss you so much, when you do feel compelled to return 
home. But you see, I dislike to be alone at night; since that dread- 
ful night three weeks ago, 1 have been so nervous, that I see a mur- 
derer in every shadowy corner. (Brown drops book on floor, Mrs. 
H. jumps and screams) Mercy! what's that? 

Brown. O! tarnation! don't beskeart; it's only a book I drop- 
ped. 

Mrs. H. O! well, I'm glad that's all. 

Brown. By the wav, Mrs. Hawkins, when is that young Dudley 
cnmin' back? He's a' likely young feller, and I'll bet it would be 
hard work for any common man ter cut him out of his swath. 

Mrs. H. He went away yesterday on important business for the 
iSquire. We exDect him buck to-night. 

Brown. Glad' of it. Guess Lilla will be glad tew ; I tell yer what 
Mis. Hawkins, those two young people have got to think a good 
deal of each other. Wall, I shall hev ter git home afore long; got 
an all fired lot of meadow grass to cut and get in; besides I want to 
get Stella hum whar' she'll be safe from sech pesky tramps as that 
ere Reade. 

I Mrs. II. I fear we have not seen the last of that man, but I hope 
for the best. 

Brown. Do yeou ever play checkers, Mrs. Hawkins? 
Mrs. H. Yes indeed, it is my favorite game. 

Brown. S'nose we hev a game. I'm reckoned 'bout as good player, 
/is there is 'round our parts, although old Hezekiah Wilkins does, 
oiv' me a good pull of it sometimes. He's as kinky as a four-year- 
ol 1 colt. 

! Mrs. H. (get checkerboard, they sit R. and arrange board) I shall 
be delighted to have a game with so good a player, even if you do 
beat me. 

Enter, Lilla and Stella, c. d. 

Whv girls where have you been? 

j Lilla. Just making a short call, that's all. Have you found an 
antagonest worthy of your steel? 

Mrs. H. No doubt; but we have just commenced to play. 

Stella, (icho has been reading paper, l.) Oh! Lilla! 

Lilla. (goes l.) Why Stella, what is the matter? 

Stella. Look! see! in this paper! read! 

Lilla. (takes paper and reads aloud) "We are informed that 
Albert Reade, who was badly injured by a pistol shot in the head, 
has in a state of delirium, escaped from the hospital, and is now 
wandering at largp, probably crazy." O heaven! he at liberty and 
crazy ! O ! I fe «r I im, whether sane or not. I have a horrible pre- 
sentiment that he will try to harm me. God knows, I had no wish 
to harm him, but I could not see him murder Fred Dudley. If you 
could have seen the fierce, terrible expression of hatred and malice 
in his eyes, as he fixed them on me that night, as he fell, you would 
not wonder that I fear, as only one can fear, when they are con- 
scious of a nameless and unseen danger ever present. 

(sinks into chair and ewers /acft 



16 THE SQUISS'S LA UGH TEH. 

Stella. Thf>r° Sear, don't be so nervous; these are not the dark 
days of the Midrtla age?, and if tiiey were, you have a brave knight 
who will goon be hern t > defend you. 

Lilla. ( chinying manner) Who<'t von rn^an? 

Stella. Who tic I mean! Why, Fred Dudley of course. 

Lilla. 0! indeed! 

Stella. Why, don't you fane? n\m for a gaU:»nt defender? 

Lilla. (spitefully) No I don't, when fie has a wife, and I don't 
know how many children at home. O .' I could scratch her eyes 
our! 

Stella. Why Lilla, you surely don't believe anything that villain 
Reade told you. 

Lilla. Yes I do. He hasn't said anything to the contrary. It's 
just like a horrid man anyway. But I don't care, (almost crying) 
I don't like him a bit, and he — he — he can be a Mormon if he wants 
to. 

Stella. There dear, I see you don't mean all you say, or believe 
it either, so don't worry. 

Lilla. Well, I'll find out when he returns. 

Stella. How ? 

Lilla. I'll nsk him. 

Stella. What! 

Lilla. Well, I'll give him a good hint anyway; if he is innocent 
he should b • proved so, and if he is guilty— 

Stella. Well, what if lie is guilty? 

Lilla. Then I know she must be homely and ugly and — O! dear, 
I'm silly and weak, never mind me. Wh/n did you hear from home 
last? J 

i Stella. Yesterday I received a letter from Charley. I shall be so 
glad to go back and see his han Isome honest face made more attrac- 
tive and dear, by contrast with that wretched man Reade. 

Lilla. Yes, Stella, you are right; it is honestly and sincerity we 
should prize. 

Stella. Did you see Mr. Dudley yesterday, before he went. 

Lill i. No, he went very early before we were up. Stella, I some- 
times think he cares for me, and during the last three weeks, I have 
learned to love him, and I am nutashamed to own it. When he held 
me in hi- arms that eventful night, I was happy and he seemed to 
be. 

Brown. What a darn fool! 

Lilla. Sir ! 

Brown. Why Lilla, t made a most foolish move, and then Mrs. 
Hawkins beat me easy ! Blame it! 

Lilla. O ! I thought you were refering to spmething else. 

Enter, Francois, c. d. 

Fran. Ahem ! Mr Dudley has arrived and will be after payin' 
nis respects p-isently. 

Mrs. II. Very well, Frrncois. 

Fran, (aside) Faith, Miss Lilla, will be in high spirits now, a3 
the man said when he fell into a barrel of eight dollar brandy. 

(exit, c. D. 
Enter, Dudley, c. d. 

Dudley, Good evening Mrs, Hawkins ; how do you do Mr. Browq, 



THE SQUIEE'S DATJGRTEE. 17 

JTr-)wri. How de do younq: man, I'm mighty glad to see von. 
W ; > n t ye to cum' down ter mv pi ice and make a long: visit and h«/ 
t drirn ^ood time. Brin-r ver wife along if ye got one, if yer haint, 
\v' v o-ir, on^. Ha! ha! ha! 

Dvdle.v. (cnnfused.airlsioatchhim) My wife ! Ah ! yes. Thanks, 
I shall he hanpy to eonip. 

Mrs. H. Mr. Dndlev, T am glad vom have returned, and T beg 
vou will now excuse me; the young ladies will entertain von till the 
Squire returns. (e X it, c. d. 

Dudley. Certainly. 

< Brown. I've got to go down to the Post Office and get the Browns- 
ville Journel. I hev it sent here every week, while I'm away from 
hum. Bye! (exit, c. d. 

Dudley. T seem t-» scare them all awav. Well ladies, how have 
you been since T loft and what doing? * Breaking all the masculine 
henrt's in the neighborhood ? 

Stella. Prav sir! do you consider that the only legitimate bus'- 
nes« ofwomnn, to break men's hearts 9 

Dudley. O! you do it nncons-iously. It is not in the nature of 
man to resist thes* hntteries of bright eve-, 

Lilla. Indeed ! You invest 'is with too much power ; we are quite 
in despair at heinw so very destructive. , 

T)ndley. Regrets are unnecessary. Indeed, man becomes a most; 
v\il ino- victim and is fortunate to become the possessor of a true, 
woman's h^art. 

Stella. B-'mvo, Mr. Dudley. I admire your generous sentiments. 

Did'ey. Thanks. 

Lilla. Yes, surely we can consider Mr. Dudley a very reliable 
source of information on this subject. 

Dudley, (aside) What the deuce is she driving at? (aloud) 
Yes. exactly. ° ' 

Lilla. How did you leave them all at home, Mr. Dudley? 

Dudley. < cheerfully) O! verv well, thank you, very well. 

Lilla. (spitefully) None of them have the measles, I hope! 

Stella. Lilla! 

Dudley. Eh! The measles? 

Lilla. (aside) T nm sure T spoke plainly enough, (aloud) And 
yon kissed her good bve, I suppose 9 

Dudley. Why of course I did. Why shouldn't I? 

Lilla. Come Stella, let us !e ve him with his conscience, if he has 
on %\ „ „. ., T .„ A . (exit. c. d. 

btella. Wait Lilla. O! you mn«t. excuse tur, Mr. Dudley It 
Is some mistake, which she will explain later, perhaps, (exit, c d 

Dudley, (astonished) Have any of them measels ! Well* not 
much. And is it wronsr to kiss my mother good bve ? The measloR ! 
Whnt the deuce! Is Lilla ang»-r, ju^t because mv voiin^ brother 
and sister have not the measles? If so, they will no donbt?contract 
the disease just to oblige her. This is not verv encouraging: I have 
inafle up my mind to tell Lilbi of my lov i for her, the first favorable 
opportunity, and now— O! these women are hard to understand. 

(exit. c. d. 
SCENE II.— Street. * 

Enter, Browv, r. e. 

Xroirn. Wall, I hev got my papperjujcWpose^ might as well go 



18 



THE SQUIRE'S DAUGHTER. 



up to the hougq and rend it. I'm kinder curU to know if Ed. King: 
hez shingled his barn vet, and when thev are goin' ter hev town 
meetin'— must get back in time for that leastwise. 

So. H. (outside, l. ) There— there young man, don't bother me 
—here's a dollar, now be off. 

B own. Here comes the Squire, darn me if it ain't. 

Enter, Squire Hawkins, l. e. 

Sq. H. Ah ! Brown, I left you comfortably settled at the house- 
How come von here? 

Brown. O ! jes cum down fur my paper. Who was yeou talking 
to back thar jes now? 

Sq.H. O! a poor devil who wa=; hungry or thirsty, or both, so I 
gave him money, same as T always do— more fool me. But 1 am 
going down to address the temperance meeting; I always speak 
whenever 1 have a chance; it makes you solid with your constituents 
you see. Better come along. 

Brown. Yes, don't mind" but it will be pretty dry I'm afraid, it's 
<=o hot to-night. * J J 

Sq. H Never mind, we can have a glass of cider after the meet- 
ing see {winks and punches Brown in the ribs) You old rascal! 
Ha! ha! ha ! 

Brown. Yougeteout! Haw! haw! haw! {exeunt, r. e. 

(soft slow music till Reade exit 

Enter, Readk, l. e., haggard, roughly dressed, bandage around head, 

crazy'. 

Reade. So turns the world 'round and 'round, and I must alwavs 
turn with it. The sound of mighty thunder in my ears, t*ie terrible 
flash before my eyes ! The flash that pierced my brain, whence cimp 
it? Ah ! I know, 'twas from the depths of perdition, from the h>nd 
himself. Av, but, the fiend transformed into a beautiful woman like 
an angel. 'TU his deep cunning: but I know that I must seek and' 
destroy her, then will the world ston turning, then too will I rest. 
But where, where is she? O! something clears from off my brain 
and I see, ves 1 see ! Ha! ha! ha! The old man who gave me 
money that T might not starve; 'twas with him she lived ! I will 
seek her and — Oh ! God ! now again does the universe turn, turn 
forever! (exit, b. e. 

SCENE III.— -Same as Act 1st, 

Lilla. (at table with book) I'm tired of reading. It's the same 
in every book, love it's foundation and crowning glory. O! what 
will Mr. Dudley think of me, asking about the measles. The pro- 
voking thing to be so cool about it! O! he cannot have a wi'e F am 
c 'ire. His eves pay more to me than his lips and I — yes, I do love 
him ! Why will he not see ? Why— 

Enter, Dudley, c. d. 

PnrUey. B^g pardon, I fear I intrude. 
Lilla. Whr rerMinly not. Why do you think so? 
D>i''le>i. O! T didn't know but you were afraid of catching the 
measles, and I did not wish to expose you. Ha! ha! 



THE SQUIRE* S DAUGIITEB. 19 

T. nit. ! you think that a good joke, but it isn't. It is rteeiJ »dl v 
Tj r and m bad taste. Suppose your wife or children should die of 
the measles. 

Dudley. Eh! children? 

hi-la. Yes! 

J-^ley. Children ! Thunder! Beg pardon, but do vou take me 
f«v a foundling hospital? As I am not so fortunate as to posses 
eitlipr wife or children, the measles dos'nt interest me ! 

Lilly. Oh ! I'm so glad! I mean er— fcnnfuxrd 

Dudley. Why Lilla, what do you mean ? ( f 

Lilla. Nothing. 

Dudley. Who told you I was married ? 

Lilla. Albert Reade, sometime ao-o 
vef f S^ Sfi ?«ndrel I ! What could have been his object ? Ah ! 
Sm>1 p5L?i? nderst ? nd \ He wlBhijd to spoil all my chances of- 
(Si) Si 6 ™ 81 Wbat am * Sa ^'' hU-I will. 
j Lilln. Yes, Mr. Dudley. 

vou^nowtL n ^ W f!! nderSt % ady0 l r Stran " e all «sions, but now that 
In ri rJtnc ' T- 7 X nOC h0pe that our short acquaintance 
has ripened into something warmer? Forgive me Lilla, if I pre- 

Soe d- LU a InZ ^ U ~\ ^ y °"' l offer ^ ou a tr " e ' honest he^rt. 
bpeak Lilla and tell me I am not mistaken, tell me that you love 

lain « v p..j n j, T1 , (puts arm around her 

Lilla. Ay, *red Dudley, I do love you. 

Dudley. Ah! Lilla, you have made me a thousand times more 

happy than I thought it possible to be. And now my ow ™ iv™me 

lone kiss, the hrst of our betrothal. J {aboudolus 

Enter, Mrs. Hawkins and Stella, l. e., both try to appear uncon-l 

cerned. 

We'll have to rostpone it. 

lf™.;IT. Oh! Mr. Dudley, I am so worried about the Squire, it is 
(so lite and he has not returned. 4 ' L 1S 

Stella. Yes, and father too, where can he be 9 

Dudley. O! don't be alarmed. Probably they will come home 
from the temperance meeting together. 

Mrs. H. But it is time the meeting was out. 

Stella. O! dear, I wish they would come. 

Dudley. Ladies, I will go and hunt them up 

kn^Fre T d! at ' s risht ; d0 Mr - Dl,dley - (asWe5 For ™y -* yo« 

Dudley. You may trust me to bring the wanderers safely home. 

mo™ y "°y W *"* "^^ Mn ^ ta '" 1 Uke "£■&?& 

ii7/a. (demurely) So do T. 

dated!* H ° W ^ h6 W ° Uld b " if he kneW how much ne is »PPre- 

£jf' ^ , T ib »? ret " vn to m * r ™™- Won't vou both come » 
iiHa. O! mother dear, if you don't nvnd, 1 prefer to sit here and 
flmsh mv book besides [ want to he hee to receive the gentlemen 
They might be lonesome to find no o le here ° eraen ' 

Jfr«, S % Nonsense ! 



W THE SQUIRE'S DAUGHTER. 

Siella. I will go with you. Lilla, let me know when they come. 

( Xit, L. E. 

Lilla. Yes, I will, (sits with hook) How different every, thing 
4eem»-. I am so happy now. Not nun unpleasant thing to spoil the 
sunshine, not one — but I forget A I ertlieade! Happy as I am, I 
can forgive even him and wish him well. And yet I fear him. To 
think of hi* being at liberty, to know the hatred he must have for 
me! Ay, I think I have good cause for fear; but I must not be 
nervous. (reads 

Enter, Reade, c. d. 

Reade. There she is .-done! Yes, solitude i> becoming tor fiends 
such as s e ! And she shall go 10 the Silent City! Then will I 
res'. O! God, the joy of it! I'll not delay, (steps forward and 
tonchrslAi.LA) At last! ( Lill a screams) Be silent! I've searched 
and seuched for you, till I am wearv, but I could not die and rest 
until you were dead, as now you must— 

Lilla. O! have mercy, you know not what you do, Albert 
Reade — 

Reade. How! What sav you? That name I have heard in ages 
pa«t, but not now in this life of dark despair? 

Lilla. Try to think and let the light of reason — 

Reade. Reason! Reason! Ha! ha! ha! Reason is dead and 
you have killed r. Ay, but you too shall be buried in oblivion! 
See! not in a common wiy shall yon die; I have here a mixture 
which, if I throw to the floor, will exnlodeand we will die together! 
'together ! 

Lilla. O ! horrible! 

Reade. N;iy, not horrible — listen, (soft music and slow till Reade 
finishes speech) Idremptofa far off city, subline in its grandeur 
and silence; and a woman rules there a'one in that Silent City. 'Tis 
ynn who are the queen and I will join you t iere and find rest for- 
ever; but first we musr. be blown to atoms in the air. 

Lilla. Madman! O ! what shall I do? 

Reade. (starts to tlirow package) L u t, us ^o now! 

Lillat Hold! You have notennu-h. You must have more to 
be successful. Go and get more and then we will die together. 

Reade. More? Ye-, yon are right, w » must have more, f will 
go, but think not to escape for I will tin 1 you out, I will return so.»n, 
Ves soon. (places explosive on (able, exit, c. d. 

Lill". What shall ido! If I stav here I s iall be killed, if I go 
to mother or outside lor h dp, he may return and blow the ho i<e up. 
I wi 1 remain, and may heaven help me and give me strength ! 
Hark ! Someone comes. 

Enter, Dudley, c. d. 

Dudley. Ah! Lilla' I cou'dn't find them, so— 

Lilla. O! Fred, listen: Th it m an Reade ha- been here. He is 
cr 7.v and was gointj to blow us b >th up with some explosive, which 
I ■• left thereon the table. 1 persuaded him to go for more, but he 
Will soon return. What, shall we do, 

hndlry. You have had a terrible fright, but compose yourself, 
T.ill.i. Lft my think— yes, 1 have it. L Ua, I have considerable 



THE SQUIBE'S DAUGHTER. zi 

mesmeric power, which I have used at limes with succss. T think 
I can get Reade into safe custody without harm to us or to him 
either. Poor fellow, he is more to be pit ed h .11 Manual. 

Lilla. But I fear for you. 

Dudley. Fear not. you stand by the table there and I will take my 
position back here. I hear him com in?. 

(stands l. of c. d. and draws drapery over him 

Enter, Reade, c. d. 

Iieade. So you wait for me; but I can find no more; no matter 
'ti< enough an I now is the time. {steps jorward to tab'e 

Dudley, (steps forward) Stop! 

Meade. Who dares tell me to stop. I know you not. 

Dudley, (eyes fixei on Reade) I am your mas.er, I command you 
;o stop ! 

Reade. My— master! I will not stop— {tries to go to t Me, but 
f* Us— music till exit of Reade) But— I — must. 

Dudley. Ay, you must. Come with me. I will lead you where 
you may rest. Come! 

Backs off c. slowly with out stretched hand— Reade follows with 
parted lips and eyes fixed — exit, c. d. 

Lilla. Heaven be praised that this ordeal is over. I will go to 
mother till Fred returns. (exit, l. e. 

Sq. H. (outside) Play ball? Wei. I gue s; yes, I should so 
argue. 

Lnter, Squike H. and Brown, c. d., bo'h flushed and slightly in- 
toxicated, but not arunk. 

Brown. Gosh ! I reckon as how me an 1 yeou kin giv' 'em pints 
on base ball; the old timers know =omethin' yet awh le! 

Sq. H. Talk about Mike Kelly ! I beg his pardon, Michael Kely 
mi 1 1 he rest of 'em. The very idea of those fellows down at the 
meeting telling us we don't know anything about baseball! O! 
well, I guess, hie! 

Brown. The moon-eyed calves! T e lkerlate we wouH sho\v\ m. 
Now you know old Hezekiah Wi kins, don't yer, yoi met down on 
my farm last summer? Wall, lie lied the darndest way ov pitchin' 
a ball you ever seed. Here, I'll show ye. ThU will do for a ball. 
(tale* explosive from table) Now Squire, will yeou ketch? 

Sq. H. £r! Willie itch? Will I catch? Let me assure vou 
my worthy friend and esteemed contemporary, hie! esteemed con- 
temporary is good ! Norico th ir, let me assure vou, that there is not 
in existence, a better catcher than myself, me! I! Eyo! Will I 
catch. 

Brown. Sho! darn me if I knowed ye w. s so smart; wall then- 
stand by — ^asy now, keerful! (tosses 

Sq. H. There now, catch it. Well yes, we ar? emperors, see! 

Brown. Ev'ry time! Let her go again, easy now, hie! 

Sq. H. All correct, (tosses) Ah! O! that's a daisy, hie! 

Brown. Wonder what's in the blame thing, anyhow? 

Sq, H, Never roind._pnce more, ah ! 



M TEE SQUIBE'S DAUGETEB. 

Enter, Dudley, c. d. 

Dudley. Hello ! what's np? Why — gentlemen — gentlemeji, don't 
foss that thing about so. O ! be careful — do you know — 

Brown. Thar' — thar* young man, don't you bust your galluses. 
We kinder know what we are doin\ (tossing 

Dudley. But I implore you — 

Sq. E. Mister Dudley, hie! lain surprised that you should be 
fio ungentlemenly, as to interrupt the progress of modern science, 
hie ! Tell us we don't know any thing about ball ? Well, no sv, hie ! 

Dudley, (aside) Here are more mad men. Unsteady as they are, 
they may drop that and blow the whole place up. (aloud) Say, let 
me join you. 

Sq. E. Shirtingly, shirtingly young man. S'pose you get a bat 
and, hie! we'll have a socia — sociable little game. 

Dudley. Whit? 

Brown. Yes, we'll see how your muscle is, hie I 

Dudley, (aside) Bat it ! well not much ! (aloud) Just let me 
teee that first, will you? 

Sq. E. I'll — see — throw hard — all right, catch! 

Dudley. Easy, I tell you, my hands are tender. 

Brown. Regler spring chicken ! Hands tenler! Gosh, you orter 
plow over a four acre lot afore breakfast, and then your hands 
wouldn't be very tender, hie ! 

Sq. E. Well catch. ( throws easy 

Dudley, (catches) All right, thank heaven ! 

SrowL \ Wot for, eh?' 

Dudley. Gentlemen, do you know what this package contains? 

Brown. Naw, and don't care a darn ! 

Sq. E. Brown, I must shay that I am shocked at your profanity. 
Misber Dudley, we are entirely unacquainted with "the contents of 
the package aforesaid— aforesaid! Now what does it contain, hie! 

Dudley. Nitro-glycerine. 

Sq.E. > 

Brown. \ >Vot ' 

They sinks into chairs — tableau — then look at each other and at Dudlky 
then rise and go down r., engage in dumb speech and look at Dud- 
ley — Brown pushes Squire H. forward. 

Sq.E. Ahem! Hie! Misher Dudley, I am sorry, deeply sorry 
that you should fall into the path of error, hie ! We are sorry that 
you have so fallen as to pre — pre — prevari — 

Brown. Yes, we is sorry you is seeh an all-fired liar ! 

Dudley. Gentlemen, I see you doubt my word. Now to prove 
that 1 am right, I will go outside and throw this alleged nitro-gly- 
cerine in here, while you two stay here. 

Sq. H. O! no! no! certainly not. Not for the world. We are 
perfectly convinced I assure. Are we not, Brown? 

Brown. Wall, ye kin bet all your corn shucks on that. I ain't no 
I102: and am open to conviction. 

Dudley. Well, I'm glad to be restored to public confidence once 
more. And now, don't you think you had better retire, and 1 will 
inform the ladies of your return. They have been somewhat wor- 
r.ed about you; in fact, I just returned from down street, where I 



TEE S QUIRE'S DAUGHTER. S3 

have been looking for you. This explosive I got to er — er — experi- 
ment with and accidentia left it on the table. Is there any message 
you wish to send the ladies before you retire. 

Sq. H. {fiercely) Betire! No sir! No! I will not retire! I 
know enough to go in when it rains, and to go to bed when I get 
ready, eh Brown? 

Brown. Course yeou do. Guess you've bin weaned and kin take 
kenr of yourself, now. 

Dudley. But my dear sir, in your present condition — 

Sq. II. (roars) Condition ! 1 am in the best possible condition 
for jiny man to be in. See here Misher D dley, hie! you will do 
me a great favor by sending Mrs. Hawkins to me at once, sir ! I 
jwish to tell her all about the temperance meetin' and the g: and suc- 
cess it was, hie! 

Dudley. Send your wife here now ! Are you in earnest? 

Brown. Course he is. Go ahead and send the old lady in. 

Sq, H. By all means. 

Dudley. All right, but your blood be on your own head. 

(exit, c. d. 

Sq. H. Hie! the idea of his talking so. Seems to me, folks think 
*ve don't know anything; but I shay Brown, just back me up when 
the old woman, hie! ahem! I mean when Mrs. Hawkins comes in 

Brown. Bet you a doughnut I will. Hark ! She coram' . 

(both very dignified 
Enter, Mrs. Hawkins, l. e. 

Mrs. H. Why James, I'm so glad vou have come. We have been 
^so worried. Did the meeting last so late? 

Sq. H. Yes Madam, exactly, hie! 

Brown. Jes so, hie ! 

Mrs. H. O ! James, you have been drinking. Tell me this 
minute — 

Sq. H. (aside) Brown, stand by. (aloud) Mrs. Hawkins, you 
do look so shilly, when you talk like that, "Tell me this minute!" 

Brown, (aside) Terrible silly ! 

Mrs. H. O, horror ! 

Sq. H. There you needn't, "O, horror !" at all. We had a big 
meeting and many were moved to tears by my eloquence, were they 
not, Brown? 

Brown, (nods and aside) In n Irv-i ! 

Sq. H. It was very warm there, hie! and after the meeting we 
drank a great quantity of cold water. Now at times water will 
affect me in a very peculiar manner. Eh ! Brown? 

Brown. Certainly Squire, certain!}', and darn me, if I ain't sub- 
ject to the same peculiarity'. 

Mrs. H. It seems a little strange that water should effect you both 
in the same way. 

Brown. Very strange, but true, by gosh! 

Sq. H. Most assuredly sho', hie! Now for your benefit, Mrs 
Hawkins, T will give you the scientific explanation of the case, for I 
pity, pvju though I despise your ignorance, and it is my proud boast 
thaL 1 always enlighten ignorance, wherever I find it. 

Mrs. H. James, how dare you talk so to me? 
Brown. Now Mrs. Hawkins, do listen to the Squire. I tell yeou 
he knows what's what. . 

Mrs. H. The idea! James^ I tell^you — 



*4 THE SQUIB E'S DAUGHTER. 

Sq. H. My dear, never mind what you tell me, it would not 
probably amount to anything anyway, but jes' you listen to me. 
You see, while standing in that heated hall this evening, where it 
was my proud duty and privilege — privilege to address words of ad- 
vice and eloquence to the vast assemblage gathered there, my brain 
became heated as a natural consequence; being thirsty I drank a 
good deal of cold water. Brown did the same. Now you know that 
heat expands and cold contracts. The cold water which I drank and 
bathed my head in, contracted the tissues of my brain to such an ex- 
tent, that it has crowded out all the ideas and sublime thoughts I 
had in store. So you see my dear, why I ain so talkative and con- 
fused like— in fact I told the bar keeper— 

Brown. Ahem ! 

Mrs. H. You told who? 

Sq. H. Eh ! O ! yes, I was about to say that I told the door- 
keeper, that the water was too cold. 

Mrs, H. Well James, I am scarcely satisfied, but — 0! James, 
you would not deceive me? 

Sq. H. No, no, not a bit. 

Mrs. H. I knew you wouldn't. 

Brown, (aside) Ogosh! What an all-3red old fraud; catch me 
lyin' like that 

Mrs. H. Mr. Brown, does it always affect vou so, at such times? 

Brown. Yes, yes, alius, (aside) O, Lord! 

Enter, Lilla. Stella and Dudley, c. d. — Lilla and Dudley, 
Squire II. and Mrs. H. converse in pantomine. 

Stella. O! father, I'm so glad you've come back. 

Brown. Well darter, here I be all rivrht. 

Stella. Bat you are not all right father. What is the matter, are 
you sick ? ^ (Brown protests 

Lilla. Tell me Fred, now did you manage to dispose of that 
madman. I have nearly died of anxiety. 

Dudley. Bv means of my will power ; I kept him under my in- 
fluence until we came to the nearest Police Station. To-monow he 
will be sent from there to the hospital and cared for. 

Lilla. O ! I feel so relieved. 

Dndley. He'll be sale enough now. The explosive proved to be 
harmless, which the poor fellow imagined to be so dangerous. 

LUla Well, my alarm was just as great, for I didn't know. Do 
anv of the rest know anything of this affair? 

Dudley. No, not one. 

Lilla. So much the better. 

Sq. H. Lilla, my dear, you look pale and worried — I hope you are 
not, ill. 

Lilla. "No father, but what in the world is the matter with you— 
you look flushed and excited? 

Mr*. II. It is the efleet of drinking too much water at the meeting 
to-night. 

J. ilia. Why, how strange; is water so harmful as that, Mr. 
Dud ev ? 

Dudley. Eh! O! ve«, yes, very bad indeed. I have known peo- 
pl ' to dh jrom the effects of water, (aside) When they were 
drowned. 



THE SQUIRE'S DAUGHTER. 25 

Mrs. H. Young folks and old ones too, it is getting i a t e; but be- 
fore we retire, suppose we sing that dear old song, "Home, Sweet 
Home." 

Dudley. Bravo ! Mrs. Hawkins. 

Vmnes. Agreed. (music, one verse and chorus 

Enter, Eeade, c. D.—j us t a t close— all start— music soft and slow till 
curtain is down. 

Reade. Home ! Tell me all of you ; where is mv home. O ! God. 
where ! Somewhere in the infinity of space ; perchance on the wings 
of the wind in the blackness of dismal nigh:, may be on the bosom 
of the ocean— some where— any where— but never, where I may 
reft; only go, sro, go on in my cursed journey forever, and you have 
done it all. O! may you long for home and rest as I do, and never 
find it. May— Oh! (gasps and falls— all gather about him and form 

TABLEAU. 

CURTAIN. 

END OF ACT II. 



ACT nr 

SCENE L— Farmkr Brown's kitchen— table a little l. c. spread for 
supper— bread, butter, apple sauce, sugar, milk, and necessary 
dishes for six— fireplace nqainst flat. it.— six chairs around the 
room— small table, l., with plants— te% pot off r. icing for Stella 
— Stella discovered arranging table. 

Stella. Bnck home again ; well, 'tis sweet and pleasant to be here. 
' f««el a sense of security and peace, that can be found in no other 
;>lice; perhaps it's because Chu-ley is near, that I am happier. Let 
me s«e, it's two month's since I returned and — there's father's step 
j!css his heart — ' 

Enter, Brown, r. e. 

Brown. Wall bo^s, how de do? 

Stella. Well and happv, father. 

Brown. Yes. it's easy 'nough tew "see that. 1 rec'on that a sartin 

i ou 'g fel'er in this destrict kinder helped to bring them roses to yer 

<heeks. Thar', thar' girl, never mind, he's a good honest lad, and 

yer do well ter hev him; but ain't it mighty near time our friends 

•wuz here? 

SteHa. Ye=, father dear, an 1 how glad I shall be to see them all. 

Browm. Yes, and I'm mighty anxious to show the Squire and 

that young Dudley over the farm. The Squire has seed it afore, but 

there's sum new things now — hello! here they are. 

Enter, Squire and Mrs. Hawkins, Lilla, Dudley and Francois. 

c.d. — all exchange greetings, Stella and Francois take roraps 

from ladies and carry off r. and return, while Brown speaks — 

Gents lay hats on table, l. 

Gol darn glad ter see yer all, every one of yer. Mrs. Hawkin's, ye* 



S6 TEE SQUIB E'S DAUGHTER. 

lookm* young as a school gal; Squire, how de rlo; Lilla, mv eyes, 
how yer do dazzle me. Mr. Dudley, I'm right glad ter see ver here. 
I'll show yer what farmin 5 is. Take off yer things, all ?>f yer. It 
does seem rood ter — 

Stella. Father, father do let some one else, have a chancs to 
speak. 

Brown. Sartin, mv dear, sartin. (ladies group r., gents l. 

Sq. H. Ah! Brown, old friend, thanks for your cordial welcome. 
It is indeed a delightful pleasure, to me at least, to be able to visit 
the country in this— er ahem ! charming season and see Nature in 
all it's er — er — all it's rural simplicity, yes rural simplicity. 

Dudley. Yes, certainly I agree, it is beautiful here. 

Brown, (reflectively) Er! yes, yes, but I don't kno' by gosh, as 
we've got eny on hand now. I'll hev ter look over the stock. 

Sq. H. Any what? 

Brown. Eny rural simplesi-n'ty, 

(Squire If. and Dudley lor>k away and restrain a laugh < 

Dudley. Just so. By the way, Mr. Brown, I should like to look 
over your farm a bit before it gets too dark. It is a large one I 
should judge. 

Brown. O! tolerab'e, tolerable. 

Sq. H. I see, friend Brown, that you have a large number of hens. 
I noticed several on the pond down there, as we came by. 

Brown. Er, what! hens! haw! haw! haw! Wall, I'll be gol 
darned; them's ducks, hen's don't swim. 

Sq. H. Eh! yes, yes, exactly ! There is no occasion for such 
levity, I assure you. I spoke advised y. N"ow I know that it is the 
custom of the times to designate those feathered bipeds as ducks, but 
the old Romans and Greeks always calle I them hens, making no d s- 
tinction, whether amphibious or not. Hence my remark. 

Dudley, (aside) Well, I'm blest ! 

Brown. Gosh! Is that so! Wall, it's mighty handy ter hev a 
good book-barnin'. 

Stella. Well, father, our friends must be hungry, so let us have 
supper. 

Brown. Of course, darter. What am I thinkin' of! Draw up 
yer cheers everybody, (all come to table and sit) That's right. 

(Stella gets tea-pot, r. 

Lilla. This is delightful. I do so admire the old farm house 
kitchen. 

Stella. I am glad you do, dear. Have some tea, Mrs. Hawkins? 
(pours tea all around, and sits while doing so — all eat 

Mrs. II. Thank you yes, it is so refreshing after a journey. 

Dudley. And 1 quite agree with you, Mrs. Hawkins. 

Lilla.' (aside) That's right, Fred. Always agree with your 
mother-in-law that is to be, and you will prosper. 

Dudley, (aside) Thank you for the hint. 

Brown. Where's Francois? Why ain't he here? Ain't he 
nungry? Darn style, we ain't much on it here, but we go in for 
solid comfort. 

Sq. II. O! he is bus)'' unpacking our baggage and will be content 
to eat later on. 

Brown. All right, if you say so. Hev sum apple sarse? 

Sq. II. Er, no thank you. 



V 



THE SQUIRE'S DAUGHTER. 21 

Slella. Will you have some more tea, Mr. Hawkins? 

Sq. H. (absent minded) No, a little sherry please— er — yes — yes 
—yes, some tea by all means. I like tea! I adore tea! And in 
connection with that, I would say that I have also a great admiration 
tor Chinamen. Why 1 tell you, it would be the greatest blessing 
imaginable for this country, if we could have more Chinamen here. 
We would learn economy, we coukl then count on the Chinese — 
American vote, in fact they would give us the cue (que) to many 
schemes, and moreover — 

Mrs. H. James, don't you think you are talking like an idiot? 

Sq. H. Eli ! yes my dear, no doubt of it. 

Stella. Will you have something more. (Mrs. H. shakes head) 
No! What! are you all satisfied? Well than, [ guess you were not 
very hungry. 

Brown. Wall, if you've all got enough, all right. But if you feel 
hungry any time, jest you dodge inter ther pantry and get a dou^h- 
nir a id a hunk of cheese, or anything. Stella, you show the women 
folks their rooms, and I'll take the Squire and Dadley out and let 
'em gop round a bit. # 

Stella. All right. Come Lilla and you too, Mrs. Hawkins. 

(exit, Stella, k. e., followed by Lilla and Mrs. Hawkins 

Sq. H. (looking out, c.) That's a tine looking turnip orch ird 
flown there. Suppo-e we take a look at it. You see Brown, I am at 
the lead of the Agricultural Depart nent at Washington, and na- 
turally feel interested. 

Brown. Yes, I shed think so. Come on. 

(exit, c. d. with Squire H. 

Dudley. Well, here goes to examine the turnip orchard. Ha! 
I. a ! ha! I must spend the time somehow till I can see Lilla alone. 

{exit, c. d. 

Enter, Francois, r. e. 

Fran. Faith, I'm ?o hungry, I cou'.d ate quail on toast, or any 
other delicate dish. Here goes — 

(helps himself to eatables on table 

Enter, Stella, r. e. 

Stella. Ah! Francois, hungry I see. Shall I bring you some- 
thing more? 

Fran, (mouthfull) No mum, thank yer. 

Stella. Are you sure you have plenty ? 

Fran. Yis mum. 

Sq. H. (outside) Francois! 

Fran. Yis sor, com in'. (exit, c. d. 

Stella. A moment to myself. I have left Mrs. Hawkins and 
Lilla comfortable, and now Charley should be here soon. Dear old 
boy, how [love him. Why, I have Lida's shawl on; I must have 
picked it up bv mistake; never mind. 1 will sit down hare and wait. 
(sits in old high backed rocker and pulU Vie shawl over her head, sits, 
l.) Ah! I hear his footsteps, I should know them among a thou- 
sand. 

Enter, Dudley, r. e. 

Dudley. Surely Lilla should be here, if she Is half as anxious as 1 



** THE SQUIRE'S DAUGHTER. 

am. Ah! there she is. r can scarcely see her dear face, wrapped 
up in that shawl, hut I recognize that— I'll surprise her. 

Stella. He'-* there I know. He thinks I don't see hiufi but I do. 
Dear old Charley! I'll keep still and be surprised. 

Dudley advances, puis hands ovir her eyes, bznds over and kisses 

her. 

Enter, Lilla, r. e., sees and retires. 

Stella. ) Charley! 

Dudley. S Lilla! 

Stella, (indi'jnant) Sir! how dire vou — how dare you insult me 
so ? 

Dudley. My dear Miss Stella, it's all a mis'ake. It was intended 
a? a snrprse for — 

HtPlla. Well sir! it w>s n surprise. But don't make matters 
worse by misrepresenting things. It's enough t) be disappointed 
without — 

Dudley. But Miss Stella, I really thought it was Lilla. Why I 
h id no idea of kissing you; I should never under any circumstances 
entertain such an idea"! I mean— of c >urse it would be a great 
honor to me— (aside) Confound it ! How will I ever get out of this. 
(aloud) In short, will you please notice the shawl you wear. 

Stella. O! yes, I see it all. It i< Lill Vs, and you thought— 

Dudley. You were Lilla. And that's what all this trouble is 
about;. I expected to m< et her here. By the wav, who is th it hand- 
some young gentleman I met down by the gate. He was standing 
there beside a very fine saddled horse and— 

Stella. Charley! O! I forgive you ! (exit, C. D. 

Dudley, (astonished) Charley! O! I forgive you ! Glad to hear 
it. thousrh whether it's Charlee she forgives or myself, it is some- 
what d flieult to tell. But where can my charming Lilla be ? 

(looks off L. 

Enter, Lilla, r. e. and sits. 

She must be here soon. Ah! my darling, I've been longing to see 
you alone ever since we arrived. 

Lilla. (coldly) Indeed ! 

Dudley. Eh ! (aside) Seem* a trifle chilly, (aloud) I thought 
I should never have an opportunity. 

J Alia. Never mind. You have condoled yourself. 

Dudley. Lilla. whit i- the nutter? What do you mean ? I c~>me 
here expecting a kiss a, wele'in ', and this is what I receive instead. 

Lilla. I think sir! there in little doubt but that you received your 
ki-s, though whe he- it was one of welco ne or otherwise, I can't 
sav. as [ didn't stop to anyliz ^ it. 

Dudley. Lilla, are you crazy? 

Lilla. Xosir! Are you? O! vou deceitful hvpocr'te, to pre- 
tend you love iup. and I come to meet you an I find vou kissing an- 
other girl with infinite pleasure. Now sir! what havj you to say? 

Dudley. Ha! ha! ha! " (laughs 

Lilla. O! why vou wretch! 

Dudley. O! there— t iere Lilla, it was all a mistake. I have had 
occasion to explain this once before, J came here expecting to find 



THE SQUIRE'S DAUGHTER. S9 

yru, saw a figure in yonder chair wifh your shawl on an 1 I thought 
it was you. I crept up softly and kissed the young lady, who proved 
to be Stella. She gave me a lecture, and now you have given me 
another, so you ought to forgive me. 

Lilhi. Well, I forgive you this once, but don't do it again. Never 
let rne see you kiss a girl again. 

Dudley . (about to kiss her) All right. 

Lilla. Excepting myself. 

Dudley. O ! that's different, (kisses her) Lilla, we must tell 
your father and mother, and I must ask the Squire for his charming 
daughter. 

Lilla. Indeed you must. 

Dudley. 1 will seize the first opportunity. But now, let us stroll 
through ihp grounds. It is getting late, but there is a glorious moon. 

Lilla. With all my heart, and mind, you behave sir! 

(exeunt, c. d. 

SCENE IT.— Street. 

Enter, Francois, r. e. 

Fran. Shure the Squire must be guiding me down to the village 
f r de noospap»rs. Begorra, whiniver shall I have any leisure time 
for meself, as becomes a gintleman of my position. Faith, now if I 
want time, I must take it, so here goes for a bit of a song lor me own 
amusement, though the folks 'round here, may think I'm crazy. 

(sings, then turns to go l. — song can be introduced if desired 

Enler t Beade, r. e. — touches Francois on shoulder— pale, well 
dressed, clean shaven. 

I) imps) The devil ! 

Reade. Nny my friend, I was, but am not. 

Fran. Oh! It's Reade! 

Reade. Can you direct me to Farmer Brown's? I was told it was 
not far from here. 

Fran. Can 1? Well I can that! Sure ain't I s'o .pin' there me- 
self along with the Squire an 1 the rest of them? But I'm o-lad ter 
s -e yer lookin' better. 

Reade. Av, thanks to tho-e from whom I deserved but little. I 
wish to see them once more, so tell me if you please, where is the 
house? 

Fran. To be sure. Well, thin ye go in a straight line around 
yonder curve, then turn to the left and go bv lour houses, thin turn 
till ye see the common oa foremist ye, and — 

Reade. Peace, man! Is it the large white house at the foot of 
th^hill? 

Fran. Yes, the very same. 

Reade. Thank you. (goes l.) Please God, I shall see her face 
or.ce more. ( exitj L< E# 

Fan. Faith I must pay, that from bein' an out and out black- 
guard, he's become quite a dacint voung man. And well he moio-ht, 
after bein* nursed back to li r e by Miss Lilla and the rest of thim.' 
whin he escaped from the Police Station and had the brain fever 
But I must be going, or the Squire will raise the d— oh ! 

' exit, L. E % 



so THE SQUIRE'S DAUGHTER. 

SCENE III.— Same as Act 3rd, Scene 1st.— table cleared off. 

Enter, Squire H. and Brown, c. d c 

Brown. Wall Squire, T recon it's 'bout time to gathe^n doors. 
Sq. H. , Quite so, friend Brown, although the moonlight 1ms great 
attractions for the young folks. 

Enter. Mrs. Hawkixs, r e., and listens. 

Brown. Yes, I guess so. I know it had for me, when I was a 
young feller and used to walk out evenings with my wife, afore we 
was married. Poor Mary, and now she is laid at rest these ten 
y ear - {wipes his eves 

Sq. II Ah! yes, 'tis sad, nnd yet the common lot of all. lam 
prepared. I hope, to be resigned when such a calamity overtakes me. 

Mrs. H. James, what i- thrit you s i.v ? 

Sq. II. (hastily) Olmyde ir, 1 was just remarking to Mr. 
Brown, the beautiful effect of moonlight on the corn fields. Now 
bring greatlv interested in agriculture, I looked into this question 
quite thoroughly. The moon, as you know, has great influence 
over the tides, and in a like manner 'tends, I think, to draw the c irn 
out of the ground and promote it's rapid growth. 

Brown. Wall, thet maybe, but I doubt it. 

Mrs. H. Jam «, I think w tho it exception, tha"— that is the most 
absurd theory I ever heard. 

Sq. H. Well Madam, you are welcome to your opinion, {aside) 
I've got her mind off of the other thing anyway. 

Mrs. II. James, you shall not be so rude. The truth is, you 
know nothing of agriculture at all. 

Brown, (aside) Darn me, if I don't think she's right. 

Sq. H. My clear, you are entirely mistaken. I giory in agricul- 
ture and honor the brave sons of toil, who till the laud and supply 
t te nation with foid ! What a glorious life is theirs. Up with the 
lark, our into the morning air among all the beauties of nature; then 
off to milk the hens — 1 mean the cows, and gather egg*. Then to 
plow the land, sow the grapes, gather potatoes from '"the vines, in 
short — 

Brown. Haw ! haw ! haw ! 

Mrs. H. The idiot ! 

Sq. H. Well, what the deuce are you laughing at? 

Brown. Nawthin' Squire, nawthiii'. 

Sq. H. Just so. Well please yourself by all means. 

Mrs. H. James, can't you see that you are exposing your io- n o- 
rance in the most ridiculous manner. Why you know no more oi 
agriculture than— than— 

Brown, (aside) Thin Deacon Perkin's fool knows of political 
economy. 

Sq. H. (in a raae) See here Mrs. Hawkins, I would have you 
understand, if indeed you are capable of understanding, that there 
is no subject under the wide canopy of heaven, with which I am.so 
thoroughly at home a* agriculture. I am the head of the Agricul- 
tural Department at Washington, and now that I am here"in the 
heart of an agricultural community, and have the opportunity to 
practically exoound my views to friend Brown, and do my duty to 
my country, I am going to do it, aud don't let it escape your re-* 
collection. Madam! 



THE SQUIRE'S DAUGHTER. 31 

Mrs. U. James, do you dare talk so to me— to me, your wife, 
and your guardian spirit, James — 

Sq. H. O! you may James till the cows come home, to speak ag- 
riculturally, hut it will avail nothing. I tell you Madam, my long 
sleeping spirit of independence is aroused, and I will no longer be 
led 'round by the nose bv a woman, and that woman mywife. 
Wouvn! I tell you woman would, if she could, tear the reins of 
government from the hands of man the world over, even as she does 
now in individual homes, of which case I am a living, miserable ex- 
ample. Woman talks, talks, talks, and ware satan to have an argu- 
ment with her, she would talk him into a fainting fit, and as he lay 
gnsping for mercy, would shout aloud her battle cry, 'Behold the 
tony ue is mightier than the sword !" Woman's tyranny ! Bah ! 1 
hite it. Yea, I will go and commune with nature! {exit, c. d. 

Mrs. II. (puts handkerchief to her eyes) O! the monster! 
Brown, {aside) Darn me, if the Squire ain't riz up in his wrath. 
(aloud) Thar', thar', Mrs. Hawkins, I rec'on the Squire don't mean 
al! he sez. I wouldn't mind if I wuz yeou. 

Mrs. II. Don't you dare speak to me! you are just as bad as he 
i 5 . 

Brown. Whew! Guess I'd better climb and commune with 
nature along with the Squire. {exit, c. d. 

Mrs. H. I can't imagine what has got into James. He never 
spoke to me so before but once, and that was when he came home 
from that temperance meeting and his brain had been contracted 
with cold water; but that is not the case this time. Can it be that I, 
am too exacting? Perhaps — I wish I could see James now. I can't 
bear to have him angry with me, for witli all his faults, there isn't 
a kinder husband and father, than my James. 

Enter, Francois, c. d. 

Fran. I've just come from the village ; while on my way home, I 
/in t Mr. Reade, who said he wished to see ye all, so 1 towld him tie 
way here; but I guess I have arroived first. 

Mrs. H. Mr. Keade, you say? What can he want? 

Fran/ Shure mum, I don't know. He didn't take me into his 
private confidence. 

Mrs. H. Wen, thank heaven, we have nothing to fear from him 
now, as he seemed to have changed during his sickness at our house. 
Inform me when he arrives. 

Fran. Yis mum. {exit, c. d. 

Mrs. H. (looks oat c.) O! I wish James would comeback. I 
can't be happy until we have an understanding. O ! there he comes, 
I musn't let him see that I am eager to meet him. (sits in chair, l. 

Enter, Squire H., c. d., goes down, R. 

Sq. H. {aside) She is there. I'm a blamed fool, but under ex- 
isting circumstanees, I can't commune with nature with auy de- 
greed satisfaction whatever. 

Mrs. H. (aside) He's there; I may be in the wrong, but he has 
got to make the first adva ices just the same. 

Sq. H. (aside) Wonder what she's mumbling about. 

Mrs, H* (aside) What's he talking to himself for. 



&8 THE SQUIRE'S DAUGHTER. 

Sq. H. (aside) I've just got to inaugurate a grand reconciliation 
scone here, but with judicial firmness and lorethoughf. T confess 
that I know nothing of agriculture, and that woman is God's best 
gift to man. Yes, I confess it, to myself, not to her. ©, no! It 
would never do to make so great a concession to the enemy. 

Mrs. II. (aside) Well, he doesn't seem inclined to begin, so I 
suppose I must, (aloud) Ahem! 

Sg. H. (quickly) Ahem ! (aside) That's encouraging. 

Mrs. H. Ahem! 

Sq. H. Ahem ! Mrs. Hawkins, er — 

Mrs. H. (coldly) Sir! 

Sq. H. (aside) Well, that's rather discouraging; the oppo- 
sition holds a determined front, but "once again dear friends, to the 
brea h." {aloud) Kr— my dear, there is no occasion for that utterly 
iii^id an 1 uncompromising reception of my well meant overtures; 
and if ii deed, there be such occasion, if there be an existing cause, L 
Jim ready to remove it, to dissolve it in the— in the dim gloom of the 
past, yes, gloom of the past; In short my dear, if I have offended, I 
tun ready to make reparation. 

Mrs. H. (more warmly) Well James you did do wrong; you 
talked to me as if 1 were a— a— a Chinaman instead of your wife. 

( iceeps 

Sq. II. There, there my dear, don't, don't let me see tears, tracing 
dues of sorrow, down those cneeks, wh'ch yet are young and fair to 
see. (aside) 1 flatter myself, that was a blamed good stroke of 
diplomacy. 

Mrs. ii. (pleased) Well James, I do think that I don't show my 
years as much as some. 

Sq. II. (aside) Ah ! I'm progressing. I will continue, (aloud) 
Kr— my dear, I was hasty perhaps, but you must excuse me, if iu 
tie violence and heat of argument, 1 did forget myself. 

Mrs. H. Yes, James dear, and perhaps I was a little, just a litt'e 
in the wrong. 

Sq. H. (aside) Is it possible ! A few more well balanced re- 
marks will win the diy. (aloud) My dear, 1 have too much regard 
lor your feel in "S, and too much affect. on for yourself, to permitanv 
misunderstanding between us to exist, so 1 be^ your forgiveness, 
and acknowledge that I might perhaps, take a few lessons in agri- 
culture with great benefit, and that woman is a blessing — (aside) °lu 
her proper place. Ahem ! 

Mr., II. O! James, I'm so glad. Yes, I freely forgive you, and 
will trv and be less tyrannical in the future. 

Sq. H. "fig well! The wound is healed and we are one, once 
moie, my dear! 

Mrs. II. Jame*! 

Sq. H. Come, come to the protecting shelter of these manly 
arms. 

Mrs. H. I come. (embrace 

Enter, Brown, c. d., looks on. 

Brown. Wall, the Squire is communin' with natur' in a new 
fashion. Ahem! (coughs 

(exit % c. d.— Squike and Mrs. H. jumo. but don't look 



THE SQUIRE'S DAUGHTER. 35 

Sq. H (rapidly) You see dear, this cow was endeavorirg to 
pMmh onto the roof of the barn, and just then— in fact my dear an i 
mv friend also— (looks around) you will see— Eh! well I don t see, 
r.hereN no one here. 
Mrs. H. We must have imagined it, James. 
Sq. H. Well perhaps, but that cough stretches the imagin ation a 
trifle. 

Enter, Lilla. and Dudley, c. d. 
Dudley. Yes, my own, I will ask the momentous question— you 
talk with your mother and I will engage the old gentleman. 

Lilla. All right Fred, and good luck. {goes to Mrs. H., i*. 

Dudley. Er— Mr, Hawkins, I have something of importance to 
sav to vou. - 

Sq. 3. All right, voung man. (aside) He is going to ask for 
Lilla, and he shall have her, but I'll astonish him first. 

Dudley. Er— Squire— I— er would like to— ahem— ask you— 
fthem— (aside) How the deuce shall I do it— (aloud) That is— 

Sq. R. 01 certainly, voung man, certainly, anything I can do. 
What is it? A loan of money, a position under the government, or 
what? 

Dudley. Really sir ! you are most kind ; but I want neither money 
or situation. 
Sq. H. So ! Well, what the deuce do you want? 
Dudley. I er— I er— I er— I want Lilla. 

Sq. H. (yells) What! you want Lilla? (all start 

Dudley. Yes sir! I love her, she loves me and refers me to you. 
Sq. H. {assumed rage) Why sir! do you know what you ask? 
You a young lawyer, comparatively poor, seek the hand of my 
daughter; I, who am a Senator of these United States! The idea 
sir! Why' my very blood boils at the insult, and every feeling in 
'ire protests at' such a mesalliance. (goes up in high indignation 

Dudley, (stares) Squire, what do you mean? 
Mrs. H. James, are you crazy? 

Lilla. Father, if you don't give your consent, I'll dispense with 
it and defy vou ! So there ! 

Sq. H. Ha! ha! ha! ha! There, there, I was only m fun. 
That's the way we act in Congress, sometimes say what we don't 
m-an and advocate what we don't believe in. Here, Lilla and Fred. 
(Joins hands) Take her my bov, she's a good girl. You are a noble 
and a true man, and that's all I ask. God grant you will both be 
bapny. You have my consent and my blessing. 

Mrs. H. And mine too. (kisses Lilla 

Dudley, (shakes hands with Squire) T. ank you a thousand times, 
sir! 

Sq. H. Well, well, say no more; and now I know you two would 
prefer to be alone to talk it all over, eh ? O ! I know how it is, for 
I've been there, (fo Mrs. H.) Eh! my dear? 

Mrs. H. Well James, I don't think we are so old, that we have 
forgotten our courting; but let us go now. 
Lilla. Well, if you really must go, why er— 
Dudley. Er, yes, if you really must— 
Sq. JS. Exactly. Come my dear, com<\ 
Mrs. «ff. Yes, or they will surely urge us to stay. 

(exit, Squire and Mrs. H., C. D, 



s * THE SQUIRE'S 1> AUGHT En. 

Du ley. How very considerate ther are. 

iileu.^nii ry V 0! Fred ' Pm RO ha PP-^ Jt seems a s though my 
nie Mas all sunshine now, with never a cloud. 

7W/*,. a it, '*'** T -' Dudley bends over her 

tn f£Ll y ' ? d l hope the clon(ls w ' " VfJr come. Happy ! I am 

whhpt PPy th!m X deServe to be ' Pm afraW - But I feel at pence 
^vun every one now, and could forgive mv worst enemy. By the 
* V ' ' w °nder what has become of Albert Reade. 

net hi iJ> ,k ^ 110L As ?00 ' 1 ;l * he f,lI1 y recovered from his sick- 
uess, ne left the house early one morning, without a word to any one. 

Enter, Reade, c. d., and listens. 

Dudley. 'Tis like him judging ' 'from the past. Albert Reade 
knows not the meaning of gratitude. 

Reade. Ton lie! 

Lil'a. Mr. Reade. (rises 

Dudley, (steps toward Reade) Sir ! you shall— 
^ Reade. Stand hack! (motions with hand, Dudley stops- calmly) 
Pardon me. Mr. Dudley and you Miss Lilla, 'twas but a touch of the 
odunruy spirit; but you say, I know not what gratitude is and 
t.iar i* false. 

Dudley. T am glad if it is so. 

wM^JZl ? T r mind .Sre tit,ld e. Mv. Reade, we are sincerely 
glad to see you have regained vour health. 

Reade. Thank you. Yes, Ihave regained my bodily health but 
my^p^nce of mind I have not, and 'twill be many a weary day before 



Dudley. Let us hope not. 

Reade. Mr Dudley and Lilla, listen to me : I h ,ve come here to 

'Peak my mind and ease mv heart, if can be. I left vour house 

vyithou^a word My heart «m. too full to speak and n v ho "nts 

or » confused During my delirum , nd sickness, von watched n 

nursed me like an angel of mercy. Am 1 a man, think von capable 

human emotion,? Ay, I found I was, for my hem melted, a 1 
the evil in my nature seemed to flee Iron, me and only the bitter 
memory of ,t remaned. Even though. it was your hand wlfi 
s-ruck me down: I blessed you for ir, and in that time I 4'! 
love von Li la, with a great and miglm- love. In this I respass not 
on your r ght. nor intrude myself on Lilla 

onef and- '" S ° nT ^ S0, ' ,0r ' C: " m0t bear t0 give ' 7:lin t0 *>*■ 
Reade. Pardon me. Yon misunderstand me. f have no wish 
that yo„ should feel even the slightest shadow of regrelfor me 
>m jromg -awav to begin life again in a new land, and I wi<n thv 

Kffi farher *" d mother, for 

; «l hen kind.vs*. And now will you both give me your hands' 

fo. 'nveT rer, " e ' meanS '"' ° h t0 me ' for 1 sha " knowl am 

Dudley. With all mv heart. 
Lilla, And I too. 'Tis nol 
1 I honor V on for it 

R ,H1P. flnl 1, pc 6 „™ h„.l, V .„ x. . ^ W€S *""<* 



t nin a ., i t ,~ viv V, . (give* hand 

...1 bono?™, for It ' ,s noble m - TO " to "cknowledgo %,r fault 

*«*, QHVH, you both. Ton will be happy fofv« 
«<Mtb, <>«e d, other. A„u now . wi.l ,-0. X haTno wtofto see 



THE SQUIRE'S DAUGHTER. ^ 

the others. If in the midst of your happiness yon can find room in 
vowr hearts, to shelter on<* kindiy thought of me, it seems as though 
I should feel Hie reflection of it in my own heart, and it would 
b • like a beautiful o\.U in the desert of my future lite! 1 owe you 
eternal gratitude. Farewell. 

Lilla. O, no! Stop with us! 

Rea<le. No! it is best as it is. Kismet! I am content, for the 
l> tterness of memory will now be sweetened by the recollections of 
thUhour. Again farewell ! (goes to c. and tarns— Lilla goes to 
tattle mil sit*, l,e%d on table— Dudley sands r., arms folded, head 
ioioid— aside) Li:ia! O! my God! Lost to me forever ! 

(exit, c. d. 

Dudlmi. Ulla, if ever man was redeemed, Albert Reade has been. 
II has bee >me good, ay noble, and I wish him good fortune. 

Lilla. Pv.ac • go with him. 

Enter, Brown and Stella, c. d. 

Brown. S > Charley h z gone, hez he? Wall, when is the happy 
1 1 v to I e ? 

'■-/p. <a. O! I don't know, but I thing Charley wants to see you 
t« -in. timw. O! Lilla, nave you enjoyed yourself this evening? 

(talk in pantomine ivit/i Lilla. 

D't //'". Mr. Brown, it's a beautiful night outside? 

Urown. Fine, vomg man, fine. Sty, did you ever see one of 
tLo^e new ihre^hin' machine? (pantomine talk 

Lilla. Why Stella dear, we will be married the same day. 

Stella. Won't that be splendid. And so many arrangements we 
bli dl have to make lor such a grand occasion. 

Enter, Francois, r. e. 

Sq. II. (outside) Come on dear, come on. 

Enter, Squire and Mrs. H., c. d. 

Hello! evcrvbodv here? % 

Brown Wall Squire, bin eommunm' with natur agin? 

So II Ahem! Well not exactly. Just been strolling about, 
breathing the free air of heaven and gathering' idea* to disse.uinate 
in Congress. 

Mr*. //. O! James, do let Congress drop for a while. 

So H All right ray dear, although it may endanger the country. 
Bv the way Brown, I want you to know that my daughter and Mr. 
Dudley are to be married very soon. 

Brown Sho ! y\ r don't sav ! Wall my darter and Charley Harris 
ar" tew toller suit, I reo'on. By gosh, we'll hev a double weddin'. 

Dudlny. That would be agreeable. 

Lilla. Very. 

Stella. A verv nice arrangement. 

ifrs. II. And I will superintend the whole affair. 

Mr II. Well everything seems pleasant and satisfactory. I i.. 
tend very soon to study up"\ngriculture, although I shall devote con- 
sidprable time to the consideration of "Home Rule in Ireland—" 

Fran. Hooray! 



in- 



J6 



THE SqviEE'S DAUGHTER. 



quwc? MyTriends^J " ™ .»' not inter ™P' *M* «»w of elo- 
abouttobfm/rried ^vX C1 noL y r°. U f r Ung T ple > Who are 

t r ont7p»^ 

"s&S 52?^ "»^ ** ioose your 

£?. #. Coming my dear! Coming! 

Mrs. Hawkins and Francois. l . 

Brown and Stella. Trrr 

LlLLA AND ReadE. 



CUBTAIN. 

THE END. 



Squire Ha wins, f. 



THE ADVENTURESS; 

—OR,— 

Lad yEvelyn'sTriu mph 

A drama in 4 acts by W. Bert Eineison, for 8 male 
and 6 female characters. Costumes modern. Time of 
performance 1 hour and 40 minute • 

SYNOPSIS. 

ACT I.-Home of Sir Harold Courtily. 

Evelyn, Sir Harold's second wife. A happy home. "I'm the happiest man in all 
England." The letter from Calcutta. "Uh! Heaven's, it is from Louisa, my wife 
whom I supposed was lost in that steam boat accident, three years ago." "Aiy poor 
Eva, this is maddening." Susan and Pete overhears Sir Harold rending the letter. 
"We'll help Lady Evelyn." Arrival of .Frank Foster, tne new Secretary. 'The solilo- 
quy. "I'll have no mercy." 

Belle and Leo. "A father's trouble." Sir Harold and Lady Eva. "No one shall 
partus." Pete thinks it time to help Sir Harold. Pete &tei Is the Calcutta letter and 
gives to Lady Evelyn. Her resolve and pian to utnnask the plotters. Frank Foster 
eomes to Lady Evelyn's aid and sends for hi-; brother Cliarley. 

ACT II.— A Plainly Furnished Rooju at a Hotel. 

Joe Rice and Rose, the Adventuress, who passes herself off for Harold's first wifo. 
Joe's soliloquy. "So I am to impersonate Dr. iVlurohy." Interview between Sir 
Harold and Dr. Murphy. Rose as an eaves-dropper. Su<an and Pete overhears the 

glot to ruin Lady Evelyn. Eva's note to Sir Harold, "1 have read the Calcutta letter." 
usan and Pete. Pete nearly talked to death by an old maid. Le..»and Bell's suspi- 
cions of Louisa — "She is not our mother." Frank Fosrer discovers in Lady Louisa his 
lost wife— I'll be revenged for all the misery she has caused me. 

ACT III.— A Reception Room. 

Arrival of Lady Evelyn disguised as Chirley Foster. Meeting of Sir Harold and 
Charley— "Thank God he did not recognize me." The quarrel between Susan and 
Pete, in which Pete ( omes off second best. Dr. Murphy and Rose, the midnight ap- 
pointment. Frank Foster overhears the plotters— "I will give you th-i merriest sur- 
prise you ever hud." 

ACT IV.-Woods Scene. 

Mi Inight. Joe awaits the coming of Rose, who surprises him. Arrival of Charley— 
"Lady Louisa, your game is up, 1 know you as Rose, the Advt_-niure-;s." An attempt to 
murder Charley, frustrated by Pete, Sir Harold, Leo, Belle and officers arrive on the 
scene. Rose and Joe prisoner's. Charley throws off disguise— "Harold, don't you 
know me." Frank Harris confronts Rose, his wife. "Lost! lost! but the Adventuress 
will die game." Death of Rose. The double wedding:. Susan and the Policeman. 
A happy ending, as Lady Evelyn triumphs over Rose, the Adventuress. 

Price 15 c. 

— n—T— — — — — *— — ' — ""' JMTM1.MM.1U ■■WWW»IU -— ... rm,^^ , llllll 

A Matchmaking Father. 

A Farce in 1 act by Shettle and George, for 2 la^e 
and 2 female characters. The inatchmak ng father has 
two daughters who are expensive in dress, etc., and it 
seems to be the only desire of his life to get thorn "off his 
hands." He at last succeeds^ and the farce tells how he 
does it. Costumes modern. Time— 30 minutes. Price 15a 



^ OUR * KITTIE. +> 

A Comedy Drama in three acts by Minnie Poison, for 

6 male and 3 female characters. Costumes easily 

obtained. Time of performance 2 hours. 



SYNOPSIS OF EVENTS. 
- £ T T 'i~iP " T l p of a ? a3 " or Har t— Ros-mond and her uncle— A letter from Col Gordon 

Pt WnLiTt m °^ ? u 7 k . ,tt u l ® ~ A resrular cyclone in pettcoats"-"Our 
-' 0~ ill n ! # ha! - Mr? ; Carters tnght-Kittie rides 'he Major's race horse. Firpfly 
AVnrbllr ofW&. few!. 1 5? th V' eath ° f "^"-Christopher Columbn«-Mr. 
-"She "eonVd i AS! iJ- ^Al" £ 1 ™ U n «>r it"— Kittie snubs the Warbler 
^ne corned from He West, she did"— R.'th ant her guardian— Col Davennort— 

i?SS» f KlUie S m °^ e -" GoldDust Arthur's a ^rivar-«'Look out ^SSSdy. 

-ThJfS^Ftte"^^^^ 18 ]* Kiltie or Rose. Ilov*-Arthur andKitt'e 
nrono J t oK-iP/il t£' T^r^ A1a \° r ! ^r 1 am ruined"-aold dust Arthur 

apt Tfr Kl rnl ie ~" ^ klttie accepts it-Mrs. Car er an • Christopher. 
Cold n,,?'7iwV« d h . om ;- Mr ^ Carter and Chr Gopher have a disagreement- 
K?tt L'q «« i Ur Tj hM rm ">* d us ~ N ? tes not worth ttV paper tbev are written on- 
K it p 8 , ™ solve -Ro^mond's appeal to Col. Davenport, a failure -$5,000 for Tu 
K ttie, if you will be ray wife-I accept it and the condition-«'God help me to bear 

H«rt-«cTmv;^M^S iS the m °^ ney ^V^S «™ you-A heaS wUhin a 
M.irr oi .J. , iMvenport comes h-re as my future husband— Kittie's fortune comps one. 
hm,- late-Arthur's dispair at Kittie's ra<h act-Co!. Davenport discoTers &t?e ?n 

r ,wci ' ff. a v T. e ^ d ' 7 ^. p. r e'.ent-Chnstopher discovers Major Hart and Mrs 
o'akind 6 a ' ° UrKlt . tle U WaS Wh ° haS savei ^"-Ha/X ending and six 
1 Price 15c. 



+¥■ OLIVET ; ^ 

-OR, A RARE — 

Teutonic Specimen. 

A Farce in one act by J. E. Crary, for 3 male and 2 fe- 
maie characters. Costumes modern. Time 25 minutes. 

SYNOPSIS. 
Curtain ri<os on a room at Madam Dear's Seminary for girls 

niT TIT he Sa ' ! " eWS t0 'T r lover Maxmillian, that they Sus 
nar. Riree rears previous to this time, R wealthy bichelor saw 
vet singing on the street, he .ends her to school, providing 
will become his wife at the end of three years. The time h«W 
pnedand August Monson, the wealth, bachelor con e ?o ' hto 
affianced. Bv mistake, Gus Monson, the rare Teutonic Specimen 
comes mto Madam Dear's house and is taken for Mono the 
bachelor. It is discovered that he is not the wealthy Mr Monson 
the young people dress him up as Olivet, to fool Monson. Madam 
schemes to get Monson to propose to her which H P ,!««! „\i / lac ! arn 
all deceptions played on him. P Happy ending Price^isc! 



The Miller's Daughter; 

OR, 

Bound in Honor. 

A drama in 4 acts by H. Jay Gibbs, for 8 male and 6 fe- 
male characters — can be doubled to play with 5. male 
and 4 female characters. Costumes easily obtained. 
Time of performa nce 2 hours. 

SYNOPS/S OF E VENTS. 

ACTI. — The MiiTer's C-»tt-*ge— A mo'taaged Homo— "El«ie must marry °qui-e 
Thornton and save our home" — Mrs D Trent's dbuMts — Beautv andD ckev— "I «on't 
be tagged" — Flirt ilion o' the heirt — "A bush'l and a pec'c an I a hug around the 
neck" — Basil Lawrence and Elsie— The secret marriaere — ".My [■torv 's told in tin 
falling water of the o d mill stre m"— B auty and Ba^l— The wager— "Are y u 
nasty n ; c^?" — Dicky's mcture and the choeo'ate dron« — The te'egram— "Beauty, b • 
a 'riend to Elsie— Beauty and the Squire— Dickey interferes— Elsie refusss to many 
Squire Thornton— Driven foil ome, with a 'ather's curse. 

ACT II. — The mountain Witch — Squire Thornton 'eeures her assistance— Basis 
and h ; s mother, Countess Harrington— The d mand— "I am married"— "A mi ler's 
daughter" — A mother's re-olve— "You are a. minor, the mirriage is i Ie?al"— The 
lailroad accident, in which Basil i< injured — Di'key's letter — att mpted ab uetion of 
Elsie — Beauty on ban ' — Rescue of Elsie — "Die you villain"— Death of Squire Thorn- 
ton— "Oh heaven! he di^d with a he on his lips " 

t ACT III.— Home of Coun ess Harrington— The b 11 — Is hel and the Countess— 
"My one wish is that you become my son's wife"— Basil can't recall the nast year"— 
"' I is only a dream' — Elsie as Mile Cerani, attends the ball — Meete Basil — "My hus- 
band '—He tells hero 1 " h's dream— The flower— Isabel and Mile— "You are an Adven- 
tur ss" — "No, lam Basil Harrington's deserted wif •" — Beauty and Die' ey — Lord 
(Hyde proposes to Beauty— The old song, awakened memories— "Elsie, El ie, my 
wife!" — Countess Harrington declares the marriage void — Despair of Elsie — "I choose 
my wife, Elsie" — " Vf other, I leave you forever ' 

, ACT lV.— The Miller's cottage— Beauty at home— B n auty tells Elsie's story t > her 
father — "I curse her"— The vengence of heiven— Return of Elsie— B auty and 
Dickev — The un^x 1 ected caller— Dickey on his knees— Elsie and Basil — "My wife, 
our marriage was legal — Dickey proposes — "Do I crowd?" — The wvse revoked, and 
Elsie and Bisil are now "Bound in Honor." Price 25cts. 

The Old Wayside Inn. 

A drama in 5 acts by J. E. Crary, for 9 male and 6 female 
characters. Time of performance 2 hours. 

SYNOPSIS OF INCIDENTS. 

ACT I.— The "Wayside Inn. Storm on the Moor. Arrival of Lady Arley and infant, 
daughter. Lill B^ekwith warns h^r. "If is death to remain longer." Arrival of 
Jack Reckwith. Murder of Lady Arley Lill saves the child. 

ACT II.— A lapse of fifteen years. LilJ and Gypsy. The dying woman. "I am 
not your mother." The secre' revealed Jack arrives. A death lied. Jaek's des- 
pair. Gypsy discovers ' er mother's papers, wbjch reveals her mother's history. Bart 
Juan and Jack meet. "T Know your, secret." "My silence is, the band of Gypsy." 
Bruce Stillwell. Lost rn Ihe Moor. Seeks shelter, and is warned by Gypsy Hi3 
escape Jack's oatb ft Ins wife's srrave. M'rder of Jrck and abduct ; on of Gypsy, by 
Bart Juan and his men. Bruce discovers Jack in time to learn of the abduction. 
Death of Jack. 

ACT III.— The Irish and Dutch Defectives. "Ish dot ?o?" Ho-^e of Lady Still- 
well. The compact between Bruce and h's mother "I love Gypgy Beckwith." Pat 
and Fritz. Cave of the Robbers. Washington dances at the point of a revolver. 
Gypsy's escape. Oath of vengeance. 

ACT IV.— Bruce discover^ Gypsy a a an Actress. I shall never marry my cousin 
Gerty. Bart Juan and Bruce. The duel, in which Gerty meet« her death. 

ACT V.— Lady Stillwell 's atlempt to discover the heiress. Bruce and Gyp«v. The 
proposal. Happy ending. Prloa l&ota. 



* LITTLE GOLDIE; 4> 

OR, 

The Child o f the Ca mp. 

A. Western Comedy Drama in Four (4) Acts for 11 male 
and 3 female characters; by 

MR, CHARLES 0, WILLARD, 

Little Goldie is a strong Western drama. It is replete 

with startling situations, thrilling incidents and 

interesting from the beginning to the 

end. Dutch, Irish and Negro 

characters for the 

comedy parts. 

SYNOPSIS OF EVENTS. 

ACT T.— The picnic near the ".Flack Hawk's" cave. The lawyers and Mike. Little 
Goldie has fun with the Judge. Mike make9 love to Matilda. The Judge is appealed 
to. Matilda, and the Judge. Joe arrived late. The Captain of the Black Hawks 
show? up. Tell-- the pang a storv. Old Jones is rich. The plot. Peter's meets old 
Jones. The struggle. Little Goldie to the rescue, backed by the Judge and hia 
"cannon." "Tt wouldn't do in this glorious climate of Colorado." 

ACT IT.— The Col. and the Mnj. lament the escape of the Black Hawks. The 
Judge gets drunk. M'ke tell* s<<me new. The boys 'lay" for the school teacher. 
The school teacher arrives. A female. The Judge makes a speech. Joe drops in and 
cuts them all out. Matilda and the Judge. Mike gets mad. The Capr. of the Black 
Hawk* again. Little Go'die at her pranks— has trouble with Godfrey. Joe inter- 
feres. The Col. and Mai. get in their work. Judge tries to escape from Matilda. 
Mike helps him out. The recognition. The story. I will be there. The quarrel. 
"Dron th-t knife, or I'll fill you full of holes." 

ACT TIL— The home of Edith. Matilda tells a little gossip and departs. Joe calls 
and tells Edith of hi* '^ve. The Ju^ge hears him refused. Joe departs. The Judge 
tries his hand. Matilda un^xpcetdly returns. The Judge in a fix. Little Goldie 
again. A new baby. Godfrev calls on Edith. The promise. "So will I." The Col. 
and Mai. Mike happens along. The Judge takes a hand. Little Goldie looking foi 
Joe. Handsome Harrv. "I'll play this alone if I diefor it" Near the Black Hawk's 
retreat. Thp Bhek Hawks. Godfrey waiting Edith's arrival. Edith arrives. 
"Never." "Then go where you helong." Handsome Harry to the rescue. "Defend 
yourself." Harry is overpowered. The fate of a traitor. Goldie to the rescue. The 
torHhlo fall of Godfrev. ■ . _ , , _ „., „ 

ACT IV.— Bummer Jone*' (George Winfred) home in Denver. Mike Flynn in 
command. The r formed Bummer. The letters. The letter from the nephew. The 
nephew arrive*. God^ev as a "Missionarv." The uncle writes a letter dictated by 
theiieph«w. TV." nrivil of the Judgp. Themurder. The Col. and Joe. Godfrey's 
claim. Mikf< tr-l's what he heard. Godfrey aceu.-ed of murder. "His child and 
t K e heire*s is 'lead." The heiress found is Little Goldie. Handsome Harry. Godfrey 
ehentctne | w. Edith <*id To«. Unemeeted arrival of Matilda. Happy finale. 

Amateurs will find this piece just what they want, as it 
was written expressly for them. 

PRICE 25 CENTS PER COPY. 



Order a copy of 

Ames' Publishing Co,, 

Uck Box 15& - - Clyde, Ohio* 



—^ 



_Z5_thbs> Plays — G antimied. 



NO. M. F. 

Comedies Continued. 

176 Factory Girl 6 3 

207 Heroic Dutchman of '76 8 3 

[99 Home 4 3 

174 Love's Labor Not Lost 3 3 

158 Mr. Hudson's Tiger Hunt i 1 

149 New Years in N. Y 

37 Not So Bad After All 6 5 

2:17 Nor Such a Fool as lie Looks 6 3 

126 Our Daughters 8 6 

265 Pug and the Baby 5 3 

114 Passions 8 4 

264 Prof. James' Experience 

Teaching Country School 4 3 

219 Rags and Bottles 4 1 

■ale with Sharps and Flats.. 3 2 

221 Solon Shingle 14 2 

262 Two Bad Boys 7 3 

87 The Biter Bit 

131 The Cigarette 4 2 

24(1 $2,000 Reward 2 

TRAGEDIES. 

16 The Serf 6 3 

FARCES & COMEDIETTAS. 

12V* Aar-u-ag-oos 2 1 

132 Actor and Servant 1 1 

316 Aunt Charlotte's .Maid 3 3 

289 A Colonel's Mishap n 

12 A Capita .Match 2 

, Kiss in the Dark 

166 A Texan Mother-in-Law 4 6 

•in A Day Well Spent 7 5 

169 A Regular Fix 2 4 

Professional Gardener 4 2 

80 Alarmingly Suspicious I 3 

32(1 All In A .Mud lie ... 

7S An Awfid Criminal 3 3 

313 A Matchm iking Father 2 2 

31 A Pet of the Public 1 2 

21 A Romantic Attachment 3 3 

123 A Thrilling Item 

•(I A Ticker of Leave 3 2 

175 Betsey Baker 

6 Better Half 5 2 

86 Black vs. White 4 2 

22 Captain Smith ..3 3 

84 Cheek Will Win 

ousio Josiah 1 1 

225 Cupids Capers 4 4 

317 Cleveland's EWeptipn Party. 5 ' 
249 Double Election 9 1 

49 Der Two Surprises 1 1 

.2 Deuce is in Him 5 1 

19 Did Dream it 4 3 

12 Domestic Felicity 1 1 

188 Dutch Prize Fighter 3 

22m Dutchy vs. Nigger 3 

14s Eh? W at Did You Say 3 1 

218 Everybody Astonished 1 

221 Fooling with the Wrong Man 2 1 

ce/.inga Mother-in-Law... 2 1 

l- r >l Fun in a Post Office I 2 

XL- 



184 
271 
209 
13 
307 

66 
271 
116 
120 

50 
140 

74 

35 
247 

95 
305 
J 99 

11 
323 

99 

S2 
182 
127 
228 
302 

106 

139 

231 

69 

23 
21 is 
212 

32 
186 
273 
296 

11 

217 
165 
195 
159 

171 
[80 
267 
809 

4* 
138 
115 

55 
2:12 
241 
27I I 
1 
137 
252 
315 

4H 



Family Discipline. 
Family Jars 



Goose with the Golden Eggs, 

(Jive Me My Wife 

Hallabahoola, the Medicine 

.Man « 

Hans, the Dutch J. P. 
Hans Bruminel's Cafe.. 

Hash 

H. M. S. Plum 

How She has Own Way 
How He Popped the Quest'n. 

How to Tame M-in-Law 

How Stout Your (Jetting.... 
1 ncompatibilitv of Temper 

In the Wrong Clothes 

Jacob Shlaffs Mistake 

Jiiumie Jones 

John Smith 

Joh:ines Blata's Mistake 

Jumbo Jum 

Killing Time 

Kittie's Wedding Cake 

Lick Skillet Wedding 

Lauderbach's Little Surprise 
Locked in a Dress-maker's 

Room 

Lodgings for Two 

Love in all Corners 

.Matrimonial Bliss 

Match for a other-Min-Law.. 

More Blunders than one 

Mother's Fool 

My Heart's in Highlands 

My Precious Betsey 

My Turn Next 

Mv Wife's Relations 

My Day and Now-a-Days 

My Neighbor's Wife 

Nanka's Leap Year Venture- 
Nobody's Moke 

Obedience 

On the Slv 

Paddy Miles' Boy 

Patent Washing Machine 

Persecuted Dutchman 

Poor Pilicody 

Quiet Family 

Rongh Diamond 

Ripples 

Room 44 

Santa Clans' Daughter .'. 

Schnaps 

Sewing Circle of Period '..'.!! 

S. H. A. M. Pinafore 

Somebody's Nobody 

Stage Struck Yankee 

Struck by Lightning 

Slick and Skinner 

Slasher and Crasher 

Takine the Census 

That Awful Carpet Bag.. 

That Rascal Pat 

That Mysterious P. 'die 



3 2 
3 o 

1 
2 



r6 



»S V 0F CONGRESS 




NO. 

mi 

167 

29] 

54 
28 
292 
142 
276 
263 

281 

312 

170 
213 
151 
56 

71! 

135 

147 
155 

lit 

157 



The Bewitched Closet 9 

The Coniing vlan 3 

Turn Him Out - 3 

The Actor's Scheme... 

The Irish Squire of Squash 

Ridge 

The Mashers Mashed 5 

The Sham Professor 4 

The Spellin' Skewl ' 

The Two T.J's 4 

Thirty-three Next Birthday.. 4 

Tim Flannigan 

Tit for Tat 2 

The Printer and His Devils.. 3 
Trials of a Country Editor.... 6 
The Wonderful Telephone.... 3 

Two Aunt Emilys 

Inch- Ethan 

Unjust dustiee 6 

Mail - 2 

Vermont Wool Dealer 5 

Wanted a Hushartd 2 

Wooing Under Difficulties 5 

Which will he Marry 2 



Widower's Trials.. 

Waking Him Up 

Why they Joined the Re- 

i- 

Yankee Duelist 

Yankee Peddler 



ETHIOPIAN FARCES. 

204 Academy of Stars 6 

\ ( ^incidence s 

An Unwelcome Return 3 

An Unhappy Pair 1 

Black Shoemaker 4 

Mack Statue 4 

olored Senators 

211 Chops ■"> 

145 Cuff's Luck 2 

190 Crimps Trip 5 

27 Fetter Lane to Gravesend 2 

230 Hamlet the Dainty 6 

Haunted House 2 

How Sister Paxey got her 

Child Baptized 2 

24 Handy Andy 2 

; .poehondriac The 2 

19 In For It 

47 In the Wrong Pox 3 

77 .Joe's Vis t 2 

88 Mischievous Nigger 4 



65 

17: 






61 
244 



If m. 

.. 2 



g 0*5 79 3 115 5 

MldnlgDi uonu. 

Musical Darkey... 

No Cure No Pay 

Not as Deaf as He Seems 3 

old Clothes 

old Dad's Cabin 2 

1 

Othello.! 4 

109 Other People's Children 3 

297 Pomp G-reen's Snakes 

134 Pomp's Pranks 2 

i 'rot. Pones Latest Invention 5 

177 Quarrelsome Servants 3 

96 Rooms to Let r „ 2 

107 School 5 

133 Seeing Bosting....~ 3 

179 Sham Doctor 3 

94 16.000 Years Ago 3 

24'; Snorts on a Lark 3 

25 Sport with a Sportsman 2 

92 Stage Struck Darkey 2 

238 Strawberry Shortcake 2 

10 Stocks Up, Stocks Down.. 

64 That Bov Sam 3 

253 The Best Oure «l 

282 The Intelligence Office... 

122 The Select School 6 

118 The Popcorn Man 

6 The Studio 3 

108 Those Awful Boys 

245 Ticket Taker 3 

4 Twain's Dodging 3 

197 Tricks 

198 Uncle Jeff 5 

216 Vice Versa 3 

206 Villkens and Dinah 4 

210 Virginia Mummy 6 

Who Stole the Chickens 1 

William Tell 

166 Wig-Maker and His Servants 3 

GUIDE BOOKS. 

17 Hints on Elocution 

130 Hints to Amateurs 



CANTATA. 

215 On to Victory 

TABLEAUX. 

250 Festival of Days 

PANTOMIME. 

260 Cousin John's Album 



MAKE YOUR OWN WIGS ! 



PREPARED 'WOOL Is an article that everyone without any experience 
enn make into 

WIGS, BEARDS, MUSTACHES, ETC., 

At very little cost, and will be sure to give satisfaction. Price 



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